Re: One loss, a million fingers pointing. -
June 19th 2009, 03:26 PM
I'm so sorry to hear about the death of your friend! Suicide is a very difficult thing to handle, and it's even harder when it's somebody so young, seemingly happy, who had their whole life ahead of them. Unfortunetely, the people suffering are usually the best at hiding it. It always seems to be the person we least except it to be- someone happy, smiley, someone who appears to love life. And it sucks to find out that they were in pain, when it's already too late. But I think the important thing to remember is that she's not in a pain anymore, and she's not suffering.
When someone dies, especially by suicide, people need someone to blame. Because they just can't bring themselves to blame the person who committed suicide, so they need other people to blame. I'm not saying it's right, but people deal with grief differently. I'm sure those girls who may have been bullying her feel so horrible about what they did now, but it doesn't mean they're not to blame for anything at all. Anyone who caused this girl suffering contributed a little to how she was feeling- but her death, her death was her choice. These girls cannot be blamed but it happens. People are blinded by grief.
I think the best thing to do is just wait for it to all blow over. If you feel like you could, maybe you could talk to these girls a little, let them know somebody is on their side a little. If you think these girls are really being bullied about this, then you need to tell someone! Prevent the situation happening all over again.
It's tough, and confusing, but these things take time. Stay strong and take good care of yourself.