[~*Free_Falling*~]

First I need to apologize, I had a bit of a moment yesterday and that caused that outburst. I've calmed down now, thank you both for believing I can be better. I guess right now I just feel very lost and scared about the future. I have no direction and it feels like I'm going to be left behind to no one's fault but my own. I'm horrible at making friends and make little effort to do so cause it always ends the same. I just lack motivation to do everything, even keeping up relationships. I know it's ultimately up to the person themselves to change things and others have pulled themselves out of harder situations. But I'm not strong, I've actually very pathetic and lazy, even if I start working hard I'll eventually just loose that drive and give up anyway. I feel really hopeless right now but if I tell anyone they'll just come to the conclusion that I'm lazy and not worth their time. I certainly would.