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Vynloria Offline
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Name: Steven
Age: 28
Gender: Male
Location: Australia

Posts: 12
Blog Entries: 1
Join Date: July 24th 2009

Not in the best mental frame - July 24th 2009, 10:41 AM

I'm not used to saying exactly what goes on in my head but I feel like I need to talk.

I've being feeling really down for the past week or so. I'm sick of the current relationship that I have with my mum, which pretty much consist of her being a childish adult (pardon the oxymoron) and me yelling at the top of my voice, usually saying "Fuck off, leave me alone" or some other profanity. I don't have a problem hearing the answer "No" to something I want, but if the "No" is based on absolutely no logic at all and is completely unreasonable, I get mad. I've been trying lately when I get mad, to walk away and say "I'll talk to you when I calm down". It worked for a bit, then it stopped working. Or I stopped working. I don't know which one it is. I've never had the want to keep at something. I'm too weak minded.

My girlfriend is wonderful. She puts a smile on my face. If it wasn't for her, I'd be long gone now. She keeps me going strong and tries to help me when I fall down. I love her more than anything, but I'm not good enough for her. I'm just a weak, selfish, competitive basted. I try to out do her at things we both are good at. I wish she'd realise what I am... A pain in the arse.

Sorry if this doesn't make much sense but it's how I'm feeling at the moment...