Hey,
Venting is really good, sometimes you just need to get it out. I'm sorry you're having such a hard time.
I'm probably not going to be much help to you because I still haven't found the answer.
All i can tell you is that i know exactly how you feel and that you aren't alone, i promise.
Maybe you should try looking at the alternatives thread if you haven't already.
Pm me if you want,
and i know it's hard but hang in there
