[annabanana.]

Hey Jill,

I hope by letting things in this post that it made you feel slightly better. Remember you can always post on here at anytime if you feel it helps. And if it doesn't, well post anyway and we will try and help in some way. :P Crying is also good, as it can help release emotions and how you are feeling. Don't be ashamed or embarassed by it.

But you are not silly, not at all. Lots of people hurt themselves or want to hurt themselves for no apparent reason. It is nothing to be ashamed of, okay? I am glad you have your boyfriend who you feel you can talk to, perhaps you could mention to him that you are struggling? Even though you may not have spoken to him "properly" in a while I think he could support you and help you in several ways.

Also, could you mention to your mum or doctor but clearly explain you do not want to go on any more medication? There should be other things they can do to help, for example have you tried counselling or therapy? That may be a good thing to do - it can help you get your deepest darkest emotions out into the open and help you deal with them.

As for not wanting to hurt yourself, have you looked at the Alternatives thread (click here)? Search through the list and see if you can find one that sticks out for you that is a possibility you could do, if it doesn't work then don't give up - try another one. And keep trying until you find one that works for you. There will be one, and if you could find more than one then that is even better as then you could chose one depending on how you feel at that moment in time.

PM me if you ever need a chat about anything.
Keep fighting!
Take care.
Anna