[kc_82]

About 5 years ago I was taken advantage of by a friend of my dad's. I had never even been kissed before and this man who was 20 years older than me was my frist kiss. My dad was dying and he took advantage of me in that time and after he died. I did everything but actual intercourse with this guy. He was also married with kids. Well it turned into a scandal and I was called a liar because of his position in the community. Through counseling I have learned that this is not my fault.

Two months after this, I was assualted by a man. I don't like the R word. Well I never reported it because of the situation with my dad's friend. I really thought I have overcome these things. However, lately I have find old memories of the assualt coming back. I see him on top of me and I am saying no. Well last night, I had a memory of my dad's friend on top of me rubbing himself against me. I do not know why all this is coming back, but it is. I cried already today over the assualt again, it's all coming back. What is happening to me?