wow. i feel like i've been beaten with a large stick.. -
July 16th 2010, 10:00 AM
soo i've dated this guy the last 6 months, we were "official" at the end of january then through february then we broke up but kept talking. we fell in love, but he said we wouldn't make it official cause he was going into the army and leaving for basic. well i always had this intuition about this girl he was friends with. well now he is in basic and we have been talking over letter. buttt me and this girl, who is very nice got to talking.. he had dated the both of us and told us how he loved both of us. he dated her after we broke up a few weeks... we didn't know about each other and there is so much i cannot add here, its suuuuch a long story. but we want no drama for him and only the best for him... i just can't help but feeling every single thing he did for me was a lie. i gave him everything, my heart, my hope, i put my faith in him. i gave him my virginity... i support him in everything and look out for his sanity all the time. i care about him more than myself.. as he cared for me, so i thought. he's not like other boys. but maybe i'm wrong and i still see hope in this world.
but if i love him so much, why am i about to write him a letter telling him to go for the other girl? she loves him just as much as i do.... i just want to be his friend at least. i feel i can do that. i have grip on the rational side of me still at least. its just being smothered by the emotional side.
i just dont know. i want to hug him and make him happy. WHY DO I CARE FOR HIM SO MUCH... meh
you can get away
with"- Andy Warhol