View Single Post
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Emderth Offline
Member
Welcome me, I'm new!
*
 
Emderth's Avatar
 
Name: Emderth =)
Age: 26
Gender: Female

Posts: 3
Join Date: January 4th 2011

Unhappy My mum is feeling suicidal, help? - July 11th 2011, 02:55 PM

So, my mum when we was younger was treated badly by her mum, I don't really know much about this as my mum doesn't like to talk about it and I don't want to force her into telling. She does have nightmares about her past, and cries and screams in her sleep. My mum has also been married twice, her first husband she had a daughter with (my sister) but they divorced when my sister was young. Then she met my dad, and they were together for several years before they had me, and then got married the following year. 2 years ago now my parents told me that they were getting divorced, and last year my mum moved out (she now lives with her brother and his wife) and i live with my dad, but my mum comes round most days after work to see me (unless she's ill)

My mum says that she doesn't love my dad any more, and the last years she felt like he didn't love her as he spent more time on the computer and watching tv than talking, and when me and my sister had gone to bed she would try to talk to him and he would be like 'Do we have to start this now? its late, I'm tired' and even when my mum started talking about divorce, he didn't react and didn't try to fix it (My dad is very, if things go bad, he will sit there and do nothing to try and not make it worse, but obviously this time it was the wrong way to act) anyway, my sister has problems with my mum. She's 25, and has 3 kids and lives with her boyfriend about a half an hour drive away, and my mum doesn't drive very far, only to work and to my house which are 5-10 mins away. And as my dad and mum work full time we only see my sister once a week, even though my sister could drive to us.

My sister is always complaining that my mum never visits, but my mum works in a shop and often works on a Saturday, while my dad has weekends off normally. So, my mum usually only gets to go over on a sunday if we all go, or if she has the day off she will try and go over by train. This has been the case since my sister moved out when she was 18, but recently because my mum and dad have broke up, she sees my mum's frequency of visiting as a sign that shes pushing my sister out as she didn't take the news of them splitting well. My sister has also been picking up on 'small things' that aren't even 'things' and blaming it on the split, which she sees is mums fault. So, yesterday, when we didn't go round my sisters as half the day was already gone, and my mum gets bad period pains, so she didn't feel up to going to a park, my sister was pissed off and brought everything up.

This made my mum feel bad again. She is depressed, and told me the other week she has tried to kill herself before. My mum was really upset and sat on the stairs, i followed her while my dad 'stayed out of the way' and my mum told me how me and my sister and my nephews are the only reason she hasn't killed herself yet, but no one other than me seems to understand that her feelings count too. She also got upset when I told her I loved her as she said if I didn't she would end her life, and that she really wishes she was dead. She was also upset that she told me all this as I shouldn't have to see her like that or hear what she says. She also started talking like she was gonna kill herself then, so i told her to text me when she got back and this morning, which she had.

I just don't know what to do, i understand where my mums coming from, and how she feels, and shes my mum I don't want to lose her, nor do I want to loose any other members of my family, so like i don't know what to do or say, if i say anything to my sister she will go off on one, i can't talk to my dad because he like wants to keep out of it all. I'm 17, and am thinking of going to university next year (I'm just going up to year 13) and if i don't go uni i'm probably moving out anyway, I don't know what my mum might do when that comes, because where i just let her talk and comfort her she relies on me, and I don't want her getting bad once I've left as I can't help.

What do I do?