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Friends and fights... Suicidal. -
July 19th 2011, 07:41 AM
I had a friend living with me for a few months, rent-free. We got jobs together, were planning on living together, just as friends.
Then she stopped hanging out with me and basically moved out, leaving most of her stuff behind and I only saw her at work. I confronted her and said I thought she was doing too many drugs and alcohol. I said it in a way that Ala-non would approve of. And thought it went, kind of well.
Then she's been ditching me hardcore. She'll say she's going to hang out, and then just doesn't. I asked her to talk to me sometime before I left for Ohio and I'm leaving tomorrow. And she just... couldn't seem to find the time... I told her I was pissed at her and wanted to talk it out. And she just got bitchy with me. I ended up crying and leaving work...
And then tonight. I finally told her fuck you. That she's been taking advantage of me, and honestly she did use me. Then she just left me... during some of the worst points in my life she didn't even fucking talk to me. She can't find five FUCKING minutes to talk to me about it.
Then my other friend texts me, telling me that I'm a bitch and it was so mean of me to do that to this person. Blah blah blah. He told me it was wrong to confront her about her alcohol problem and that I was immature in doing so. Then said he still loved me and hoped things turned out okay. O.o
I've been crying since it happened, and I can't stop. I'm literally suicidal over this. And honestly probably would have done it if I wasn't going to Ohio tomorrow. I self harmed really fucking bad... It doesn't need stitches but I really need to be careful.
What do I do? I'm planning and going and seeing this person at work tomorrow and just fucking... I don't know. Make her talk to me. I don't want to lose her as a friend, I don't want to enable an alcoholic either. I just.. .want to die this is hurting me so bad.
The best wayout is always through~
-Robert Frost
Proud member of the LGBT community.
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