I always keep this poem, "Don't Quit" which says when the tide is the lowest, don't stop because it is just about to turn. I now realize how true that really is. Moving day is this weekend, and my mom and I were going to stay with my grandfather while trying to look for jobs. At this point it would of made things much harder and my mom and I have been fighting so bad. She's also been trying to talk me into hospitalization since I have been constantly suicidal.
Anyway, I got hired this morning which changes ALL of our plans.
This means I do NOT have to go stay with my grandfather which would of made things difficult. I get to NOT stay with my mom who controls every aspect of my life despite the fact I am 20 years old. I will be staying with my aunt temporarily while I am in school. Yes, school. Now I can save up till the end of the year to pay for gas and books so I can attend college next semester. No more dealing with my mom who doesn't want me around, AND I get to go back to college. Omg, how wonderful! No one can tell me that I'm not doing anything with my life now, because I've been trying so hard for a job so I can keep going to college! Sure, this job only pays minimum wage, but by the end of the year, I will have enough saved up to go back next semester, and I'll keep working a few days a week and have enough for the following semester as well and soon I will be able to transfer!
Self-harm free since 10.1.2013
"You have not failed if you learned something from it."
"Life's not about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain"
"Weak heart, Dying soul, Falling apart, Make me whole, These broken blues, Peirce your being, Hide the truth, You won't be seeing."
"Deeper, Deeper, Deeper inside me I live a life that seems to be a lost reality."
"Big Brother is watching."