[Lost_Confused]

My boyfriend and I live together, but we're with his parents and his brother. He works graveyard shift, and I work either mornings and afternoon, or afternoon and evening. Or sometimes all three. We hardly ever see each other, and on the weekends when he's actually home at night, we get to sleep together but we have to go to separate rooms at 7 in the morning because he's afraid his parents will come upstairs and see us sleeping together and freak out. Which wouldn't happen, his parents don't come upstairs unless his dad comes up every so once in a while at like 6 at night to work out with my boyfriend. But I want to be able to go to sleep with my boyfriend, and not have to worry about getting up at a certain time because he's worried about his parents. We aren't even doing anything, it's just sleeping. They don't even care, his parents and his brother were talking about it, and they told his brother they didn't care as long as we, you know, aren't doing it. But he's worried anyways. And we won't be able to sleep together or maybe all weekend even with his extra day off from work for Labor Day because he thinks he may be getting sick. I don't have school the next couple days, but I have work in the afternoon and evening. I'll hardly see him, and we will hardly be around each other.

I've been starting to find a couple other guys attractive, and started to kind of like them a little bit, even though I know I love my boyfriend. I think I'm just lonely, and since I know they find me attractive, I just... I just find them attractive. I feel bad, but I just can't help it. Whenever I'm actually home with him, he's always making fun of me for something, or teasing me over something. He knows it irritates me, but he does it anyways. I'm just tired, lonely, and I don't know what to do. And I was really depressed for a while because I had a second miscarriage and I think it's carrying over into this, and it just sucks.