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xxprincessxx Offline
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Name: Sammie
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Location: Ohio

Posts: 488
Join Date: March 7th 2010

this isn't me.... - February 7th 2013, 08:29 PM

all i want to do all day is sleep.
i force myself through everyday life (some days) but i honestly feel like i can't do it anymore.
i can't sit through class, i can't study, i can't focus on my school work.
but i feel like if i miss anymore class, i'm going to fail.
which would mean i would have to drop out of college.
it's my 3rd year, i've worked to hard for all of my dreams to fall apart. :/
the counselor that i see consistently twists my words around and honestly makes me more depressed than i was before my appointment.
only one person on this campus knows that i'm depressed.
and a friend from home.
i have nobody to open up to, and it's getting to the point where i would rather keep things inside.
i don't like being with my friends, because i don't enjoy anything.
but honestly on the outside it's like i'm happy and i'm okay.
i smile, i laugh, i pretend like everything is fine.
just today the one person on campus that knows was like: "you seem to be doing so much better today."
in all honestly, today has been the day that i've felt the worst.
i don't know what to do.
my thoughts are plagued with so many ideas of just giving up.
but what if i fail at that, too?
i'd be kicked out of school and having to sit at home all the time were i'm more depressed.

all i want is a place to call my own and
mend the hearts of everyone who feels alone,
you know to keep your hopes up high and your head down low.