back to day 1 -
April 29th 2025, 02:37 PM
This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.
Yesterday during school I had cut myself and panicked. I told my teacher because there was a lot of blood, and then she grabbed the nurse and guidance counselor and I stayed in the nurses office with the principal, social worker, and doctor the rest of the day. I re-wrapped my arm this morning because that's what they wanted me to do. I feel like shit for cutting myself again. Now my blades, lighters, and everything is taken away. My privacy is gone, they're going through my backpack every fucking day at school. It's so damn annoying that I have to do that everyday. I won't even make it to homeroom. Today I have a field trip too and they're doing it. I wish I could go back to the way things were where my backpack wasn't being searched by the fucking school and I could make it to class in time without a morning check in and I could stay until the end of the day without an end of the day check in. God I hate it so fucking much. My arm burns too. Nothing is fucking right anymore. My parents found out Im cutting again. Lord nothing could be worse than that. I want to be normal again...help...
When I look in the mirror
I don’t see myself
I feel trapped in my own skin
I feel wrong.
I am not your daughter
nor your sister
I am your son
And your brother
I am not your niece
I am your nephew
Can’t you see?
That is not me!
This is me.
Someone nobody else will see. -rae
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