Song/Quote of the day!

Who will love me for me
Not for what I have done
Or what I will become
Who will love me for me
'Cause nobody has shown me what love
What love really means
What love really means

i don't like being sober, that's when it hits me it's over.
although it was my choice, i can't shake your voice.
[I Don't Wanna See You With Her - Maria Mena]

i don't want to be in love with you anymore. i ended everything, shouldn't that be enough to convince me that i'm not in love with you anymore? it's a damn good thing i deleted your number because i'm drunk and all i want is you. i cried at the gym when this song started playing on my spotify, but the hurt and the tears only made me want to run faster. the faster i ran, the less i could think about you. but i'm not running anymore, now i'm stuck in my bedroom and i want to run, but my tired legs can't carry me any further today.

I couldn't accept we were ending
I gradually started to drift
In the back of my mind was pretending
That I could handle it
I couldn't handle it

Just wanted a moment of silence
Not everything ending in war
The tiniest problems made giant
What were we fighting for?
What are we fighting for?

What I'm about to say
Won't be easy to swallow
What you felt today
Will be as painful tomorrow
Painful tomorrow

It's enough, it's enough, it's enough for me
It's enough, it's enough, it's enough, please you gotta see
I'm leaving you, you
I'm leaving you, you
You're okay, you're okay, you're okay without me
Comes a day, comes a day, comes a day when I'm convinced that you'll agree
That I'm leaving you, you
Leaving you, you

I wouldn't have thought I could carry
The weight of us all by myself
Our differences just wouldn't marry
I had to beg for help
Got it from someone else

What I'm about to say
Won't be easy to swallow
What you felt today
Will be as painful tomorrow
Painful tomorrow

It's enough, it's enough, it's enough for me
It's enough, it's enough, it's enough, please you gotta see
I'm leaving you, you
I'm leaving you, you
You're okay, you're okay, you're okay without me
Comes a day, comes a day, comes a day when I'm convinced that you'll agree
That I'm leaving you, you
Leaving you, you

you said that you put in most of the effort to keep our relationship afloat, so why do i feel like i did that instead? the more i listen to this artist, the more i see our entire relationship in her words. we broke up, but you're going to be okay. you have a future, but i can't see past tomorrow.
you're living, i'm surviving. i'm not meant for anything that lasts.

and you know what? you shouldn't have fucking touched me like you did. all i can do is feel your damn hands all over my body and i have to drink or work out or starve myself to convince myself i can feel anything but your hands. in the moments my mind isn't occupied by anything else, all i can think of is you. i still feel your hands all over me. maybe you lost tangible things, but you don't have to live with the reality that you let someone misuse you. i'm dirty. i'm unlovable. why did i not say no louder? with more force?

why do i miss you still?

[TheAtomicBlade]

What's left inside him?
Don't he remember us?
Can't he believe me?
We seemed like brothers
Talked for hours last month
About what we wanna be
I sit now with his hand in mine
But I know he can't feel...

[TheEdenProject]

And I knew it but Proof isn't here to see me through it
I'm in the booth popping another pill tryna talk myself into it
Are you stupid? You're gon' start dissing people for no reason?
Especially when you can't even write a decent punchline even
You're lying to yourself, you're slowly dying, you're denying
Your health is declining with your self-esteem, you're crying out for help

Made a wrong turn, once or twice
Dug my way out, blood and fire
Bad decisions, that's alright
Welcome to my silly life
Mistreated, misplaced, misunderstood
Miss 'No way, it's all good', it didn't slow me down
Mistaken, always second guessing, underestimated
Look, I'm still around
Pretty, pretty please, don't you ever, ever feel
Like you are less than, less than fuckin' perfect
Pretty, pretty please, if you ever, ever feel like you're nothing
You're fuckin' perfect to me

You're so mean when you talk about yourself, you were wrong
Change the voices in your head make them like you instead
So complicated, look happy, you'll make it
Filled with so much hatred, such a tired game
It's enough, I've done all I can think of
Chased down all my demons, I've seen you do the same

[obelus]

where do i take this pain of mine?
i run, but it stays right by my side

so tear me open, pour me out
there’s things inside that s c r e A M and S H O U T
and the pain still hates me
so hold me until it sleeps

[.Brittany.]

I am here, I am here
I've already seen the bottom, so there's nothing to fear
Know that I'll be ready when the devil is near
I am here, I am here
All of this wrong, but I'm still right here
I don't have the answers, but the question is clear

[Mindfulness.]

Don't compare your life to others. There's no comparison between the Sun and the Moon. They shine when it's their time.

[Storyteller.]

you're not a shadow;
you won't fade.

[daisy_jam]

https://youtu.be/9m7tPikH0UA

Came across this song and I'm thinking what the fuck the fuck?! It's so catchy though, it's stuck in my head

[Virgil]

"Dernière Danse" by Indila
Je remue le ciel le jour, la nuit
Je danse avec le vent la pluie
Un peu d'amour, un brin de miel
Et je danse, danse, danse, danse, danse, danse, danse
Et dans le bruit, je cours et j'ai peur
Est-ce mon tour?
Vient la douleur
Dans tout Paris, je m'abandonne
Et je m'envole, vole, vole, vole, vole, vole, vole

The worst is over now and we can breathe again
I want to hold you high, and steal my pain away
There's so much left to learn, and no one left to fight
I want to hold you high and steal your pain

[Starseeker]

Mirror Mirror on the wall
True hope lies beyond the coast
You're a damned kind can't you see
That the winds will change
Mirror Mirror on the wall
True hope lies beyond the coast
You're a damned kind can't you see

(Blind Guardian - Mirror Mirror)

Don't let your lights go down
Don't let your fire burn out
'Cause somewhere, somebody needs a reason to believe
Why don't you rise up now?
Don't be afraid to stand out
That's how the lost get found
The lost get found
So when you get the chance
Are you gonna take it?
There's a really big world at your fingertips
And you know you have the chance to change it
There's a girl on the streets, she's cryin'
There's a man whose faith is dyin'
Love is calling you

[Storyteller.]

i can forgive
& be forgiven
by learning to heal
with a heart wide open.

The only way is to let go, get rid of all the fear,
Of not being perfect. My goal seems perfectly clear
Terrified if I let go, I also lose myself,
And I don't wanna be somebody else

The ugly naked truth:
She starves me of my youth,
And I stand alone until
You catch on.
I swear it's not by choice.
But Ana has this voice,
And it calms me down,
It gives me purpose.

And it's alright,
I'm alright,
I want to be okay.
I've seen it before,
This eyesore; it's me.
Ohh, ohh, ohh, me.

I want out from under
This confining skin
That I so reluc-tantly live in.
My worth is measured solely
According to the scale.
I am heavy, but I feel frail.

And it's alright,
I'm alright,
I want to be okay.
I've seen it before,
This eyesore; it's me.

[TheAtomicBlade]

I keep falling out of line
I was drained and left behind
All will fade and petrify
Feed the hate and start the lies
Falling in between, I am caught beneath
Light the way and let me go (suffocate inside)
I will break and watch you crawl
Bury me alive!

[Starseeker]

Juodaan viinaa,
Tullaan viisaammiksi näin.
Juodaan viinaa,
On todellisuus piinaa hetkittäin
Selvinpäin

(Korpiklaani - Juodaan Viinaa)

"The greatest happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved; loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in spite of ourselves."

[Kintsukuroi.]

The water filled my lungs
I screamed so loud but no one heard a thing

Rain came pouring down when I was drowning
That's when I could finally breathe
And by morning, gone was any trace of you,
I think I am finally clean

You did the right thing
Covered your scars
Challenged your faith
And closed your eyes driving cars
For all that they knew
You were safe home
But you went through hell
Whenever you were left alone

But you could see where I had been
From the pictures that they took
I tried to look positive at things
Faced myself but didn't look
That was not honest
I am not healthy
I am not honest

[Starseeker]

"I'd much rather face a fighting-mad Brocando, or Jornarileesh in a fury, than Bane."
- Terry Pratchett The Carpet People

[TheAtomicBlade]

Noises, noises, people make noises
People make noises when they're sick
Nothing to do except hold on to nothing
Noises, noises, people make noises
People make noises when they're sick
Nothing to do except hold on to nothing

"And maybe I push you away to see if you care enough to pull be back in"

(You are the only one whose cared enough to do so and I have no idea why)

[TheEdenProject]

Evans Blue - The Future In The End

[Eternal]

I'm better off, better off without you
I'm better off, better off, I don't need you
Someday soon
I'll be gone for good

I think it's time that I'm alone
And truth be told, I know it's wrong
That I keep reliving the memories in my way
But I can't stop

You think this is poetic, but darling, you can’t write poetry from the grave.

i don’t think this is poetic, I don’t think this is romantic. Anorexia has taken everything from me, and I’m afraid it’ll take my life too.

Ungrateful heart,
No one's taught you how to love
And I wouldn't know where to start
Your big blue [green]eyes have seen all of me
Now I can't deceive, even with the more persuasive little lies

You're scaring me, I wanna go home
I can't believe I'm saying this but leave me alone
You know too much I need to get away
I'm doing you a favour, maybe you'll thank me one day

What a coward I am
All my life's been spent inside here
You're my one chance to take a stand
But I couldn't take the pain
If I decided to let you in
I risked someone meeting me again

It's scaring me, I wanna go home
I can't believe I am saying this but leave me alone
You know too much I need to get away
I'm doing you a favour, maybe you'll thank me one day

One day.

[Starseeker]

When you see me, better flee me
When you hear me, better fear me
I help you from the fryer into the fire

Na na na na na - Call me Mr. Killjoy
I'm the death of every party
Na na na na na - Call me Mr. Killjoy
And I don't care if you don't like me

(Lordi - Mr. Killjoy)

This hunger grows inside me like a tumor,
The dizziness just compliments
This failure of a girl.
I’m settled now,
This show of mine consumes me,
But every pound I shed
Speaks volumes of my lack of self control.

Self-fulfilling prophecy,
You’re the only one that dare speak the truth about me;
In this town, with
Well intentioned mothers,
Starving daughters,
Worried lovers.
I swear to you, I’ll never eat again.

Starve, Erin. Starve. Run the extra mile. Put on makeup. Smile, be pretty. Make them think you’re healthy. You’re okay. Just starve.

I never really wanted you to see
The screwed-up side of me
That I keep locked inside of me so deep,
It always seems to get to me
I never really wanted you to go
So many things you should have known
I guess for me there's just no hope;
I never meant to be so cold


What I really meant to say
Is I'm sorry for the way I am (Is I'm sorry for the way)
I never meant to be so cold
Never meant to be so cold

Shame on you for making me wait
Time and time again you're too late
And I'm about to make a mistake
so please hurry babe
just hurry


You might as well just take it from me
You said that I should take it from you
but I don't know if I agree
so please hurry babe
but don't you worry


'Cause I'm not convinced that I am worthy of your time
And I will do what it takes to make you mine
so sit back, relax, enjoy my show
this could be funny
Oh, I'm about to lose control oh ohoho ohoho


Maria Mena - Lose Control

[Starseeker]

Come together
Together as a one
Come together
For Lucifer's son

(Ghost - Monstrance Clock)

[TheEdenProject]

Breaking Benjamin - Failure

little girl, twenty-one, the things that you've already done
anything to get ahead.
and you say you've got a man,
but he's got another plan.
he only wants what you'll do instead.

well, little girl, twenty-one, you never thought this would come
you starve yourself to play the part.

if i'm small, i won't be used. if i'm small, i can be safe. if i eat, i can't be small.
i've already eaten today. i've already eaten too much and my friends want to go for dinner and one already knows about the eating disorder and i'm going to cry because i'm going to have to eat and i don't want to.i eat so little, but i still gain weight. my weight keeps going up and i can't handle it. i just want to be small.
i need to be small. once i'm small, i can be safe. i'm too big for this world.

I've been walking around all day thinking
I think I have a problem, I think I think too much
I've been taught to hold back my tears and avoid them
but you've made pain into something I could touch
I've been walking around all day laughing
Think I'd be better off without you here
And I bet you're sweet and hard to get over
So I'll cry and people will stop and stare
Now that's ok, let them stop and stare
Cause I am fragile
I am hopeless
I'm not perfect
But I am free

[TheEdenProject]

Imagine Dragons - Whatever It Takes is stuck in my head

[Starseeker]

Fool
just another
Fool
just another
Fool
just another
Fool
just another
Fool
just another
Fool
just another

I've been waiting
For signs of god
Create
enslave
behave
Everything is out of control

Leave me alone
Isolation bears hope
There's something else waiting
A promised destiny
Freezing me
I feel restless and low
These days full of sadness
Had joyfully changed
Into fear
My freakshow will start tonight
Don't miss the right time

Bright eyes
Blinded by fear of life
No Merlin is by my side

Everything is out of control
Everything is out of control
In my future plans
Everything is out of control
No one's left to hurt
Everything is out of control
Sorrow's gone away

Broken memories
Walking upstairs
Step by step
I see the whole world burning
The poet dies in Newerland
How it burns

Hey, mother stubborn
I really hate you
If you say yes I will say no
Ashes to ashes
But dust won't be dust
If you go there
I will go back

Bright eyes
Blinded by fear of life
Betrayed by sunrise
Bright eyes
Blinded by fear of life
No Merlin is by my side

Hey, father stubborn
You're ying
And I'm yang
I feel alone
Who really cares
Born into ashes
To lose all the games
With a smiling face

Bright eyes
Blinded by fear of life
And dark dragons rise
Bright eyes
Blinded by fear of life
No Merlin is by my side

So I sit still in my room, today
Winter's here
In summer season
Shall I say
I was wrong
If I'm right
Farewell to my last hope

(Blind Guardian - Bright Eyes)
This is not my favourite song, but I swear it's one of the best by the best band. The whole of the lyrics is so meaningful that I couldn't just cut out half of the song.