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Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
February 26th 2010, 08:54 AM
I act like fine, but I really don't want to live, honestly. But who will bear this burden if I am gone? No one. Brother is too young and immature. I will have to continue to walk on this cruel world with this heavy luggage on my shoulder.
To laugh often and much; To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; To earn the approbation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; To appreciate beauty; To find the best in others; To give of one's self; To leave the world a bit better...; To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived - This is to have succeeded. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
March 3rd 2010, 08:01 PM
I almost wish I could just tell my parents everything... maybe a mental hospital would be good for me...
“I can only hope that they’ll turn that anger and frustration and madness into something positive, so that two, three, four, five hundred will step forward, so the gay doctors will come out, the gay lawyers, the gay judges, gay bankers, gay architects … I hope that every professional gay will say ‘enough’, come forward and tell everybody, wear a sign, let the world know. Maybe that will help.” Harvey Milk, 1978
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
March 4th 2010, 02:09 AM
There are secrets that I will always keep for myself only, not one person on earth will know about them, and those secrets are what built me, my character, my world. They are mistakes, mistakes made on purpose and for some to me unknown reason i am fine with them.
"Wondering, wonder, wonderer
You're searching for what, what is to search
You're longing and looking once again for a home
Angery, anger and agony
The pain is pain, pain is to be
The remedy is on its way it will relieve
Been through the fire and been through the rain
Called the wonderer and yet have no name
If I were you won't you want me or is in my head.
Or is it in my head
Or is it in my head"
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
March 4th 2010, 10:16 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by BelowZero
I act like fine, but I really don't want to live, honestly. But who will bear this burden if I am gone? No one. Brother is too young and immature. I will have to continue to walk on this cruel world with this heavy luggage on my shoulder.
that at times is my worst secret. but probably now when some thing happens or im thrown into certain situations i switch off my emotions, i dont controll it, i know i started doing it when i was being bullied, but now i cant stop it from ahppening.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
March 5th 2010, 07:35 PM
if this murmur is serious, I'll die if I have to quit music... whether by my hand or someone elses... it'll all be over.
“I can only hope that they’ll turn that anger and frustration and madness into something positive, so that two, three, four, five hundred will step forward, so the gay doctors will come out, the gay lawyers, the gay judges, gay bankers, gay architects … I hope that every professional gay will say ‘enough’, come forward and tell everybody, wear a sign, let the world know. Maybe that will help.” Harvey Milk, 1978
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
March 5th 2010, 10:41 PM
I'm going to be your first love, and I'm going to hurt you... I'm ending my life, because you deserve better, and I don't want to live without you. I know you are strong enough to live without me though. As you said once, "I would probably just work and drink more." That's okay. You work more hours than you should now...so nothing will change, and you can drink more like you've been wanting to. You know the ferrets can go to mom, and you can keep Jack. All my stuff can be sold for more money. I want to be buried in my ring though...I hope that's okay. I don't know if I want you to move on or not...but I don't want you to always be sad or alone... I love you, and I know you love me. I just need to go
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
March 7th 2010, 08:09 PM
I don't think i'd even care if a king asked me out, you're the only one that i want, and i'm just making myself feel cheap with other blokes just to distract myself from how much i really do like you, and you talking about other girls ABSOLUTELY kills me but i know this isn't going to work, and i just wish i dunno, it would? ><
Lauren
"The stars are always there but we miss them in the dirt and clouds. We miss them in the storms. Tell them to remember hope. We have hope."
"But in the ruins there is still a canvas. There is still beauty in your brokenness. The faded scars show healing reminding me that even though I’ve been in dark places, I’ve survived and learned and become stronger".
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
March 7th 2010, 08:40 PM
I can't believe I've survived this year.
If you hadn't have come home early that one day, I would have killed myself.
I'm glad he never called me back.
I want you more than anything, but I'm to scared to go for it even though I know your interested in me...
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
March 9th 2010, 10:23 PM
I am scared that this march is going to bring back my depression... lately, i can't be happy, and everything is going wrong... I am not sure how to handle this
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
March 9th 2010, 10:38 PM
I have no shame in admitting:
I have a pet hate against women at the moment.
I too, masturbate on pretty much a daily basis
I may or may not have sexuality issues.
I lie about not believing in love, but do not put faith in finding it.
I want to die young. (Preferably by anothers hands, because I'm too much of a pussy to kill myself)
And... I don't believe in god (not that its a dirty secret).
I don't like to whizz in people's pockets, so I will always give you truth. I'm opinionated, so take what I say with a cup of salt.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
March 11th 2010, 01:26 AM
Even though I love you
I want what im doing to hurt you
sorry, well, maybe I'm not.
Life is to short to put it off anymore
You gotta live it before it’s too late
I can’t turn that clock back around
On what you’re dreaming about
You better do it now, don’t wait Do something crazy and dumb, while your still young. <3
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
March 16th 2010, 08:06 PM
You are breaking my heart, but if I stop talking to you, I'll die.
I'm sick of living. I wish I could just end it now but I'm to scared to end it.
“I can only hope that they’ll turn that anger and frustration and madness into something positive, so that two, three, four, five hundred will step forward, so the gay doctors will come out, the gay lawyers, the gay judges, gay bankers, gay architects … I hope that every professional gay will say ‘enough’, come forward and tell everybody, wear a sign, let the world know. Maybe that will help.” Harvey Milk, 1978
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
March 18th 2010, 04:38 AM
Every month when there is no food in the house gives me more and more reason to start starving myself again. I know it isn't your fault, I know it is mine and my choice. But how do you think it makes me feel? Knowing that no cares enough to make sure there is food...
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
March 18th 2010, 06:11 AM
So, yeah, here's the deal. I really did not need your pep talk. Your stupid 'You don't know good your life is and you have so many opportunities in front of you' speech made me want to kill myself.
And I can just picture all you smug little doctors, if I tried and failed. I'd be sitting there, and you'd see only the Surface Me. You'd sit there, all high and mighty, wondering why this silly little girl tried to kill herself.
"You have good grades. You have your whole life ahead of you. You have friends who care about you. You are blessed and you are lucky and you don't even know the first thing about sadness, or hopelessness, or death. So whyever would you want to kill yourself?"
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
March 20th 2010, 02:03 PM
I hate taking my pills every morning and every night. I'm sick of the constant reminder that I can't function without shoving a bunch of chemicals into my body.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
March 20th 2010, 09:41 PM
I want to tell him that I love him, when he says he loves me. I know I still love him, and I can see the hurt in his face when all I say is "thank you", but I can't say it. We can't be together so I can't le myself get caught up with something that's not mine anymore. I feel terrible and guilty, but I can't do it.