I think I'm pregnant again

[Nonoka]

My boyfriend and I have been together for 7 months now and and in the last month or so we started to get more intimate. My period is over a week late now and I'm usually pretty regular. I'm fairly sure I'm pregnant again and I already have a 1 year old daughter. I'm worried for so many reasons. I am graduating highschool this year and my daughter and I live at my parents house. When I was pregnant with my daughter my Dad kicked me out and didn't even start talking to me until she was 6 months old. I moved back in at the end of summer and I'm worried if I am pregnant that he will be really angry and kick me out again. I am also worried my boyfriend might leave me like the Dad of my daughter did although he's a lot nicer to me and my daughter then my ex who has never even met his daughter. And I'm terrified of going through labour since I still feel kind of traumatized by my bad first experience. I am going to get a pregnancy test today to find out but I'm soo stressed out! I feel so stupid for not being extra careful, we've been using condoms but I probably should have got birth control too. I really like my boyfriend a lot but I definitely didn't want to this to happen when we haven't even been together a year. I already have a strong feeling that I'm pregnant though like a test will just confirm it. I have no idea how to handle this.

Hey there,

I am sorry you are dealing with such a stressful situation at the moment. I am glad that you will be taking a pregnancy test at some point. Until you take the test try not to freak out too much because there are a lot of different things that can cause a period to be late.

It is understandable that you would be worrying a lot about all the things that *could* happen but please try not to overthink and take it one step at a time. It seems like you had a bad experience with your daughters father but that doesn't mean that the current person you are with will handle something like this the same way. It's definitely a possibility but there are a ton of guys out there who choose to do the right thing. As for your parents, try not to worry about that until you have too. If you end up being pregnant you will probably need to talk to your boyfriend and let him know what you want to do about it and go from there. Hopefully he will be supportive and the two of you can figure out how to best handle your parents.

I hope that things end up working out for you and I hope that you will keep us updated. Maybe once we know what the results are we can better support/advise you.

Best regards.

[Nonoka]

I told my boyfriend that I think I might be pregnant, I just wanted to get it over with sooner then later Instead of stressing about it for a long time first. He took me to buy a pregnancy test and I took it at his place. It was positive, I am definitely pregnant. I am only 2 to 4 weeks along I know that for sure. my boyfriend was actually really happy that I am pregnant he's already talking about how he can find a bigger place to rent and we can all move in with him and he hopes it's a boy because we already have a girl. I know he likes kids and wanted kids one day but I'm really surprised and Even more relieved that he's so happy and supportive about it. But I'm not so sure I want to rush living together just because we are having a baby though... And I'm not sure how to tell him. I haven't told my parents yet but I think I am going to wait a little while for that. I had to have an emergency c-section with my Daughter and I really don't want another c-section but I might have to. I have heard of vbacs but I don't know a lot about it and if its risky or not but I guess I'll find out.

Hello,

I am glad to hear that your boyfriend was supportive. I hope he will prove to be a great support person throughout this process.

If you are not ready to move in with him you do not have too. If you want to wait a while to figure things out than you can do so. My hope is that he will be understanding of the fact that you are nervous about the concept of moving too quickly. The thing to remember is that he cannot force you to move in with him. The best advice I can give you about talking to him about this is that you are honest with him. Let him know that you care about him but you want to take things slower and not rush into moving in.

In regards to telling your parents, if you aren't certain how they will respond it might be best to wait until you have another living situation figured out, even if it is not with your boyfriend. The only reason I say this is it would add a ton of stress if they found out and weren't supportive and you no longer had a safe place to stay. Once you have a safe place figured out you will probably need to discuss it with them as long as telling them won't be dangerous in anyway.

As for the VBAC, I am not 100% certain how that works either. I have a cousin that had to have a c-section for her first pregnancy and due to that she was advised by her doctor to continue having c-sections with her two other children. That being said, if you want to look into not having to have a C-Section you could probably talk to the OBGYN you will need to see at some point in the future. I do not have a ton of knowledge about it and since I am not/have not been pregnant I haven't looked into it. Although, my hope is that there might be a user/users here who will have more knowledge.

Best regards.

[Nonoka]

Update: I talked to my boyfriend about not wanting to rush moving in especially since my parents don't know yet and I'm hoping they don't have to for a while. He is looking for a bigger place to rent so we can start getting it ready for us to move in before the baby is born but it will hopefully still be a couple months. I just had my first appointment yesterday and we estimated that my expected due date is October 20th which means I'm only about 4 weeks along. I was told they don't recommend a vbac but it is an option we could look more into if I'm really interested, guess I'll need to do more research. My first ultrasound is scheduled for 4 weeks from today!

Hey there,

I am glad you were able to talk to your boyfriend and he was receptive to what you had to say. It is great that he is listening to you and I think it's great that he is going to continue looking for a place as that can take a while.

I think looking into VBAC a bit more would be a great idea. I know there is a lot of information out there and it might help you come to a decision. Also try and keep the communication with your treatment team because they should be able to provide you with decent insight as well.

Best regards.