Guardian_Angel Offline

I've been missing you extra recently. You were supposed to be here for all of this. Missing you is an unbearable pain that I feel everyday. I think about you every day. I miss you every day. And I wish you would have believed me when I told you that would happen. I need you so much, I don't know what to do without you. I can't do it on my own. My heart hurts too much missing you.

How has it been nearly four years since I came to say hi? You randomly popped into my head the other day and I realised how long it had been since it happened. That day still feels strange to me. I hope that wherever you are is happy. You're still very very missed.

Peter, I fking miss you.
There's so many things that have happened. So many. And you weren't here for any of them.
Some of them, you'd probably be happy you missed. Honestly, a lot of the last year isn't something I'd wish on anybody, so I guess it's a silver lining you didn't have to go through this... seemingly endless madness.
But... you've missed a lot of good things too. A lot of REALLY good things. It's been just over 9 years now, which means you've missed over 9 years worth of memories, stories, jokes, laughs, loves. You've missed everything.
But me? I've just missed you. Every fking day, for over nine years. The only day that I won't miss you will be the day I join you- wherever that is.
Je t'aime beaucoup mon ami <3

Hi. I don't know what I am doing here. There was a post made by you in this thread I was looking at for nostalgia's sake. Spent the past five or ten minutes going through all the pages, my heart breaking more and more with each message posted on here.

There haven't been any posts made in over a year, closer to two years. TeenHelp isn't as active as it used to be. I miss the days when we would have lively chats and just utter nonsense. I am forgetting them, Peter. My brain just isn't what it was seven years ago and I don't know if it's age or consistent abuse of substances. But it isn't young and fresh like it once was.

My last message on your wall was in June of 2012. Wow, I said some weird things and oh, that I would come back to post on here again and within the next four months. Well, over five years later, here I am. First post of 2019 and two days before what would have been your 29th birthday.

So, um, yeah. I hope you have a good birthday in Heaven. Or wherever you are.

My heart feels like it stops every time I think of you. I miss you so fucking much, it's worse than any mental health bullshit I ever deal with. I wish you would have considered that before you fucking left us. I wish you would have listened when we said how much we care.

6 years... wow... I try to avoid thinking of you as much as possible, as horrible as that sounds. I don't think I can ever forgive you, but maybe I am finally ready to move on. Goodbye, Peter. May you rest well, and may we see each other again.

Happy birthday, Peter. You'd be 26 today... the fifth birthday of yours without you here. Goodness, how I wish you were here... I wish I could tell you everything. I wish I could show you my tattoo, wish I could have gone to France for you, with you, wish you could meet Josh, wish I could talk to you about all the politics... I just wish I could talk to you, even one last time.
I hope your soul has found peace. I hope that you have found your place in the stars, and watch over each of us with the love and happiness that you did while you were alive. I wish that you can see the good, see the love and the light that was so difficult to come by here on this plane. I truly hope that you are happy now, wherever you're at...
Bon anniveraire, mon amour. Je te manques toujours, et je t'aime beaucoup. Tu es mon coeur, mon espere, mon vie ajourd'hui, demain, et hier. Repose en paix, mon ami, mon frere, mon ange ♥♥

I don't come by here properly very often these days, but I hope you realise that you impacted so many people here, even those like me who have half/completely moved on from TH. We miss you, Peter.

I had a weird moment the other day. I was adding my friend on Skype and he happened to look at my phone and notice a notification for your birthday. He asked who you were, and I just said, "Someone I used to know," although I'm not sure that's right. I didn't know you that well, I just wish I had.

I miss you <3