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Anxiety and Stress This forum is for seeking advice on anxiety and stress related issues.

Thread: DUI: feeling pretty hopeless Reply to Thread
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Topic Review (Newest First)
Today 09:23 AM
Mindfulness.
Re: DUI: feeling pretty hopeless

Quote:
Originally Posted by Proud90sKid View Post
Yeah, it helps to think that as bad as this situation is, I could have gone to prison for a long time if i had a major accident (and I have gotten in car accidents, but not while drinking). There is a girl named Jamie Komoroski in South Carolina who had a pretty similar relationship to alcohol as me and very much loved to party. What is crazy is that her instagram is still up and you can see her posts in the days leading up to an accident that would drastically change her life. She was having an excellent time/enjoying life. Was not a bad person, but loved to have fun. She ended up with DUI manslaughter on a bride on her wedding night. I believe she also injured the groom. She was sentenced to 25 years in prison, but with credit for time served on house arrest...so something like 22 years and she will have to serve 85 percent of it. This has clearly had a toll on her mental health as she no longer looks like she used to. Rapid weight changes and a generally miserable look on her face. Of course, everyone is commenting on her appearance on social media. She no longer looks like a stereotypical sorority girl. While she experiences remorse, she is understandably very upset about her situation, and she is getting roasted for that as well (ie. "She only cares about herself!" is posted everywhere online and possibly influenced her sentence). I can't imagine how any of that must feel. I don't think it is realistic for someone to not grieve over such a sentence even if the sentence was for doing something illegal. At the end of the day, it probably felt like a total black swan event for her. She was not a hardened criminal. Just an ordinary girl who had a bit too much to drink one night before driving.

I disagree with the sentence though and the way our justice system works. There are other cases of people getting much less time in states with similar laws. For example, Florida is also a tough-on-crime state with the 85 percent rule and there is a case of a man getting 10 years for a very high BAC fiery car crash (did not notice traffic was backed up on the interstate and rear ended a car at highway speeds, causing a fatal pileup). He has had more than 5 DUIs (maybe more like 10) in various states and as a result had also been caught driving on a suspended license enough times for it to be considered felony disregard of driving privileges. He was still racking up DUIs even though his driving privilege was permanently revoked. 10 years vs anything higher also makes the time much easier. It allowed him to be put in minimum security and is serving out his sentence at a work camp and not a "big time" prison. There does not seem to be much consistency between cases unfortunately. Her case was more publicized and that was undoubtedly a factor in her sentence. It was also likely a factor that the woman she killed just happened to be on her wedding night and this resulted in much more outrage. I don't think WHO you accidentally kill during an involuntary manslaughter should matter. The man could have faced 20 years easily if the judge gave the max sentence for the manslaughter and also sentenced the felony driving while suspended consecutively and not concurrently (and while I am not a lawyer, I think that would be justified because his repeated driving while suspended was somewhat of a separate entity as it occurred multiple times over a long period). He got 5 years for the driving while suspended and 10 for the manslaughter, but they are being served together for a total of 10 years.
The thought of hurting or killing someone because I was driving while under the influence is enough to put me off for a lifetime.
Yesterday 09:48 PM
Proud90sKid
Re: DUI: feeling pretty hopeless

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mindfulness. View Post
Hi there,

I agree with the fact that drinking is extremely dangerous while driving. There are a lot of factors that can influence our blood alcohol reading to be over the legal limit which impacts our ability to drive. Not only does it put your life in danger, but those around you as well.
Yeah, it helps to think that as bad as this situation is, I could have gone to prison for a long time if i had a major accident (and I have gotten in car accidents, but not while drinking). There is a girl named Jamie Komoroski in South Carolina who had a pretty similar relationship to alcohol as me and very much loved to party. What is crazy is that her instagram is still up and you can see her posts in the days leading up to an accident that would drastically change her life. She was having an excellent time/enjoying life. Was not a bad person, but loved to have fun. She ended up with DUI manslaughter on a bride on her wedding night. I believe she also injured the groom. She was sentenced to 25 years in prison, but with credit for time served on house arrest...so something like 22 years and she will have to serve 85 percent of it. This has clearly had a toll on her mental health as she no longer looks like she used to. Rapid weight changes and a generally miserable look on her face. Of course, everyone is commenting on her appearance on social media. She no longer looks like a stereotypical sorority girl. While she experiences remorse, she is understandably very upset about her situation, and she is getting roasted for that as well (ie. "She only cares about herself!" is posted everywhere online and possibly influenced her sentence). I can't imagine how any of that must feel. I don't think it is realistic for someone to not grieve over such a sentence even if the sentence was for doing something illegal. At the end of the day, it probably felt like a total black swan event for her. She was not a hardened criminal. Just an ordinary girl who had a bit too much to drink one night before driving.

I disagree with the sentence though and the way our justice system works. There are other cases of people getting much less time in states with similar laws. For example, Florida is also a tough-on-crime state with the 85 percent rule and there is a case of a man getting 10 years for a very high BAC fiery car crash (did not notice traffic was backed up on the interstate and rear ended a car at highway speeds, causing a fatal pileup). He has had more than 5 DUIs (maybe more like 10) in various states and as a result had also been caught driving on a suspended license enough times for it to be considered felony disregard of driving privileges. He was still racking up DUIs even though his driving privilege was permanently revoked. 10 years vs anything higher also makes the time much easier. It allowed him to be put in minimum security and is serving out his sentence at a work camp and not a "big time" prison. There does not seem to be much consistency between cases unfortunately. Her case was more publicized and that was undoubtedly a factor in her sentence. It was also likely a factor that the woman she killed just happened to be on her wedding night and this resulted in much more outrage. I don't think WHO you accidentally kill during an involuntary manslaughter should matter. The man could have faced 20 years easily if the judge gave the max sentence for the manslaughter and also sentenced the felony driving while suspended consecutively and not concurrently (and while I am not a lawyer, I think that would be justified because his repeated driving while suspended was somewhat of a separate entity as it occurred multiple times over a long period). He got 5 years for the driving while suspended and 10 for the manslaughter, but they are being served together for a total of 10 years.
August 3rd 2025 11:11 AM
Arabesque- golfing girl.
Re: DUI: feeling pretty hopeless

I'm sorry about what you are going through and I hope that you can find someone to help you to feel better.
August 3rd 2025 07:29 AM
Mindfulness.
Re: DUI: feeling pretty hopeless

Hi there,

I agree with the fact that drinking is extremely dangerous while driving. There are a lot of factors that can influence our blood alcohol reading to be over the legal limit which impacts our ability to drive. Not only does it put your life in danger, but those around you as well.
August 3rd 2025 02:47 AM
Proud90sKid
Re: DUI: feeling pretty hopeless

Quote:
Originally Posted by ¯|_(ツ)_|¯ View Post
This definitely isn’t an ideal situation and I’m sorry you’re going through it, but I can’t say the consequences weren’t deserved. They fit the situation. Drinking and driving is incredibly dangerous and while you may think you’re okay, there’s a good chance you’re not, especially if you’ve had more than one or two drinks. You see tons of people who think they’re okay to drive and then they fail the sobriety tests. I know Ubers are expensive but it seems as if it’s a lot more expensive to get your car out of impound and pay for bail, AND to have consequences like no ID in the meantime. Can you borrow money from your parents to get a non-driver ID in the meantime?

If your drinking is getting to the point where you’re getting in trouble with the law I STRONGLY urge you to get help from either an individual therapist or some type of rehab program. The judge may even be more lenient on you if you say you’re accepting help and truly mean it.

I dont really agree tbh. Punishments are trumped up due to MADD.

It would be fair if they chose chose one of the three: 1) throw me in jail and then be done with it, 2) take away my license, 3) prevent my from drinking. Ridiculous to take away a license, take away their medical marijuana card (that I paid state for), require me to be not have so much as a beer for a year. All that on top of "natural consequences" like like higher insurance. "12 hour" DUI school requires almost everyone to go to "additional therapy" at your expense and you face additional drug tests there on top of probation. I just want to serve it out and not have to be forced into additional counseling just because it is a money making thing. The DUI school partners with various organizations and the evaluator sends almost everyone there. I am definitely lying in that evaluation, because if they aint honest with me, I wont be honest with them.

Frankly, I am drinking more than I did before the DUI. If I have to be on probation anyways, may as well party as much as possible beforehand. I am just going to drink again the day I get off probation anyways.
July 12th 2025 08:31 PM
¯|_(ツ)_|¯
Re: DUI: feeling pretty hopeless

This definitely isn’t an ideal situation and I’m sorry you’re going through it, but I can’t say the consequences weren’t deserved. They fit the situation. Drinking and driving is incredibly dangerous and while you may think you’re okay, there’s a good chance you’re not, especially if you’ve had more than one or two drinks. You see tons of people who think they’re okay to drive and then they fail the sobriety tests. I know Ubers are expensive but it seems as if it’s a lot more expensive to get your car out of impound and pay for bail, AND to have consequences like no ID in the meantime. Can you borrow money from your parents to get a non-driver ID in the meantime?

If your drinking is getting to the point where you’re getting in trouble with the law I STRONGLY urge you to get help from either an individual therapist or some type of rehab program. The judge may even be more lenient on you if you say you’re accepting help and truly mean it.
July 12th 2025 07:57 AM
Proud90sKid
DUI: feeling pretty hopeless

Last night I was on an ordinary night out. My headlight gave out (for no reason…and they are expensive to replace…yay).A cop pulls me over and could tell I had been drinking. I refused the field sobriety test but accepted the in station breath test. I was told my license would be suspended for longer if I refused(true). I thought my BAC was low enough to pass, so I did it. I blew around twice the legal limit. Instant DUI. Not just DUI, but aggravated DUI due to how high I blew. There was a girl there going through the same thing and we both got taken together from the station to the jail. Hated the ride to the station in cuffs and the ride to jail. Hated everything about the encounter with the police. I was finally booked into jail (which took hours) and put into some open dorm type cell with people with various charges (mostly domestic violence and drugs). Seemed like an incredibly boring place. Meanwhile my car was inpounded and I had to pay 700 to get it out plus 500 in bail that I wont get back as it will be used for court fees. Keeps getting worse the more I think about it My parents had to come drive my car for me because my license was revoked and confiscated on the spot. I no longer have any form of ID. Im currently unemployed so I cant get a hardship license. That means I cant renew the title for my car nor have it parked outside. So Im not sure how I will keep it. Having to lose your right to drive sucks in and of itself, but is even worse when you have to lose your car as well due to title issues. It also means everyone is going to probably find out. Even when I do get a job, which will be hard with no car, I will struggle to be able to afford insurance with a DUI on record. On top of that I have a newly broken computer (making apply for jobs harder if not nearly impossible with no car to get to a library either) and Ill probably not only go through my savings but also a good chunk of a nest egg my parents saved up for me. Feeling pretty awful. Yeah I made a mistake and it would be 1000x times worse if I had an accident, but wow this is still really really incredibly bad. Im sure there are also some fines and penalties imposed by the court on top of what I am dealing with, particularly if I can’t get this reduced from an “aggravated DUI” to even just a normal DUI. The more I think about it, the more devastating repecussions that I realize. Had lots of hopes and dreams for the next phase of my life that I don’t see how are going to happen soon.

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