I'll try to sneak on but I can't make any promises because if my mom walks in she'll definitely force me to shut down, all I can hope is that she's asleep.

You don't have to see her to explain to her what is going on. IF, and I mean IF, because you don't know for certain that she is gone, she will understand why you didn't answer without having to say a word. She'll be watching over you and won't want you to die just to explain something. That can happen when the time comes and you grow old, and not before. She'd want you to LIVE first.

none of that is an option.... good bye and yes she will want me too explain it too her soo i have too see her

Please just hold on. It's not worth killing yourself over this. Know that whether she is alive or not, she would definitely not want you to commit suicide just to be with her again or to punish yourself all of this. No, just the opposite. She'd want you to keep your head held high and carry on for life, as much for you as for her. Think of your bestie and all of the people that obviously do care about you. Put yourself in their shoes. Would they like it if you committed suicide? Definitely not, and neither would your worst enemies wish that on you. It's not worth it.

I'm sorry that I have to go now, I really am, and I really DO want to hear from you tomorrow because you CAN get help. Call a hotline or talk it through with someone or even go to the hospital.

i wont be alive than soo goodbye forever

Honestly that I don't know.

ugh my mom is yelling at me to get off. :/ She can tell when I'm still on or not because our Wifi blinks. Send me a PM and I'll answer tomorrow night?

thanks when will he write back

http://www.teenhelp.org/users/rob/

Here's his profile and then from there send him a private message.

how do i find rob????

I think it would mean more coming from you if you asked, and you'd have more details to give than I would on why you are asking about her. And the thing with it is it is bad now, but it won't always be.

NO!!!!!!!!!! EVERYTHING IS FUCKED!!!! AND I DONT KNOW ASK ROB FOR ME PLEASE