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Showing Visitor Messages 5551 to 5560 of 9624
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He's in tenn. I only know him cuz he's the lea of this newish band and yeah :/ but we've been talking for a few weeks and then like four days ago he said he was starting to like me and that i seem really cool and am stunningly beautiful and stuff but I'm not. And I can't handle compliments like that. I really can't. It drives me nuts and makes me feel so much worse. Like my bf, he doesn't say that stuff. He knows I won't take it well. I mean he still compliments me and all, but it's not that direct where it hurts and turns me against myself. It's subtle. Things like 'I like it when you smile' or 'you shouldn't hide your face' or things like that. Twin knows how to make me feel not as monsterous. Normal compliments, direct and strong, they make me feel awful, and I turn into a bitxh :/ ugh I'm the freakig worst
yeah, I understand. If there's anyway you can print it out and just hand it in that way, maybe that'll work? -
Maybe.. And I honestly don't know when someone's flirting with me. But we've been kinda fighting. Like hell say something like I'm pretty or gorgeous or whatever and then I say no, so we fight about that. Or about being sorry. Or last night I thought I upset him and then that turned into a huge thing with me telling him he doesn't know what he's getting into since he's like dead set on trying to make me happy and that he should get out before I tear him apart and such and ugh. Idk. I mean, I can see us being friends. He's cool and nice and all. But I hurt everyone I care about. And I know if he really falls hard for me, he's going to get seriously burned. And I don't want to hurt him. Idk
And awwhh
I'm sorry love -
I'm nervous too. I haven't finished y homework yet, and.. I think this guys I really starting to like me and I have no idea how to deal with that.... Plus I have a bf and I don't know how to tell him that Ido without breaking his heart ffffffffffssssssssss
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Government is killing me. I have a test...on Thursday...*dies* and it's fine I know a lot of people who changed their schedules. -
OH NO. I'M SO SORRY. I hope you can change it
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Hehe.
Blah, found out I have a different English teacher than I thought and I hate the one I actually have. ._. Rawrrr.
Lol, when I say I "know" them, I just know them to say them. I wouldn't talk to the vast majority of them. People are scary.
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Not much really just been hanging out with my friends really
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Next tuesday What have you been up to?
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Bahaha, I'm 5'10".
Ah, no.
I hope you can get it sorted eventually!
Yeah. Well, my school is pretty small, so I'm familiar with everyone in my year group, and my classes so far are okay. And I have my favourite teacher for English and my second-favourite teacher for Irish. 
(yes, we learn Irish, because we can't speak our own language 
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About Me
- Basics
- Name
- Dez
- Gender
- Agender
- Pronouns
- They/Them
- Location
- Connecticut, USA
- Country
- United States
- About
- About me
- Hey all! My name is Dez, and I am a 28 year old who just graduated with my Masters in Public Health. So I basically just entered the "real world" and have to be an "adult." Ew.
On any given day if I'm not here you'll find me napping, sitting in therapy, or watching something on Netflix. I'm trying to do this thing called "finding a hobby," so feel free to pass along your favorite books and TV shows.
I have an interest in sexual health, especially contraceptives, the prevention of sexually transmitted infections as well as HPV and the vaccine in particular. I stand with Planned Parenthood and similar reproductive health organizations. I also have an interest in vaccines.
I'm still basically trying to figure everything out myself, but feel free to say hello. If I don't answer right away, rest assured that I will when I get a chance! :D
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I became a LiveHelp Operator on December 1, 2011. On January 29, 2012 I changed primaries to HelpLINK Mentor. On April 23, 2012 I became a Self Expression Forum Mod. On October 8, 2012 I became an LGBT+ Forum Mod. On December 1, 2012 I became a Chat Moderator. On February 9, 2013 I became a HelpLINK Moderator. On July 13, 2013 I became a member of the Performance Committee. On August 17 2013, I became an Albums Moderator as well as a member of the Articles Team. On October 13, 2013, I became a Self Harm Forum Mod. On November 16, 2013, I became a member of the Social Networking Team. On December 23, 2013, I became a Social Groups Moderator. On December 23, 2013, I also became a member of the Videos Team. On January 25, 2014, I became a Blogs Moderator. On April 12th, 2014, I became a Project Advisor. On August 31, 2014 I became a member of the newly formed Volunteering Committee. On March 27, 2015 I became a Newsletter Editor. On August 1, 2015 I became part of the Disputes Committee. On August 17, 2015 I became a Forums and Community Officer. On April 30, 2022 I became a Community Team Leader.
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Last updated 11/19/23
- Details
- Here for
- Like to help and be helped
- Relationship status
- What's that?
- Sexuality
- I'm here, I'm Queer
- Ethnicity
- Caucasian/White
- Education
- Master’s in Public Health
- Occupation
- Unemployed
- Politics
- Democrat.
- Religion
- Exploring Unitarian Universalism
- Zodiac sign
- Gemini
- Interests
- Hobbies
- I don't know anymore.
- Music
- Lights <3
- Movies
- The Day After Tomorrow, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Horton Hears a Who, Repo! The Genetic Opera, The Little Mermaid, Finding Nemo, Finding Dory... I don't watch many movies.
- Television
- House M.D., In Plain Sight, Nurse Jackie, Rizzoli & Isles, Hell's Kitchen, Once Upon A Time, Necessary Roughness, Chicago Fire, Justice League, Scrubs, Rick and Morty, Bojack Horseman, Brooklyn Nine-Nine, The Good Doctor, The Good Place, The Resident, 9-1-1
- Games
- Portal, Portal 2, The Sims 3 and 4, Plague, Rocket League, Golf With Your Friends, Magicka, then your classic board games.
- Books
- TJ Klune books
- Sports
- I don't like sports.
- Heroes
- The therapists that deal with my nonsense lol
- Favorite quotes
- The world is round, so the place that may seem like the end, may also be only the beginning.
- Other interests
- Being a mermaid.
Sleeping.
Eating my sister's food.
Zumba.
Sloths.
Guinea pigs.
Sexual health and reproductive rights
Vaccines
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Signature
- The sun is always gonna rise up
You need to get up, gotta keep your head up
Look at the people all around you
The way you feel is something everybody goes through
Friends
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Blog
View Face Up.'s BlogRecent Entries
Latest Blog Entry
Posted in Uncategorized
Dear French Toast,
I found you gone on February 13, 2026, and sent you to be cremated that same day. I am excited to have you home with me. I want you to be with me forever. Right now, I’m glad you at least have Pancake’s soul with you so you’re not alone. Tell her hi for me, and that I love her, and that I see both of you again soon.
Your death was different than Pancake’s because I couldn’t say goodbye. I found you and you were already dead, but your body was still...
I found you gone on February 13, 2026, and sent you to be cremated that same day. I am excited to have you home with me. I want you to be with me forever. Right now, I’m glad you at least have Pancake’s soul with you so you’re not alone. Tell her hi for me, and that I love her, and that I see both of you again soon.
Your death was different than Pancake’s because I couldn’t say goodbye. I found you and you were already dead, but your body was still...
Posted in Uncategorized
This is a letter to my guinea pig, Pancake, who passed away 7/1/25.
Dear Pancake,
You left this world on July 1, 2025 after a brief illness and were cremated on July 3, 2025. I am sorry that I didn’t notice that you were sick sooner, such as when you stopped wheeking for food when I passed your room around dinnertime. The room was quiet whenever I walked by for a few days, and I thought it was because you were getting tired of my dinner selections. Maybe if I saw that...
Dear Pancake,
You left this world on July 1, 2025 after a brief illness and were cremated on July 3, 2025. I am sorry that I didn’t notice that you were sick sooner, such as when you stopped wheeking for food when I passed your room around dinnertime. The room was quiet whenever I walked by for a few days, and I thought it was because you were getting tired of my dinner selections. Maybe if I saw that...
Posted in Uncategorized
My dad searched my room before I got out of the hospital and took my good self harm and suicide methods. I'm trying to wait for the right time to get them back and it's so hard. What he didn't find to self harm isn't as satisfying so it's not giving me that same sense of relief. I was self harming a little more severely before he took away all my stuff and now I can't get back to that same level. And I had a plan for those suicide methods.
I also gave up what he didn't find of my...
I also gave up what he didn't find of my...
Posted in Uncategorized
12/26/2024
Well, I got a little too silly. Here's to hospitalization number 6.
Where I go to group made me go to the ER because of an increase in suicidal ideation, self harming almost daily, and nonstop anxiety.
The ER itself wasn't bad. My patient sitter was so nice and we had a lot of great conversations I haven't had with previous sitters. Then I transferred to the ABU part of the ER where I had my own room with a TV and watched a SpongeBob marathon.
I got to the...
Well, I got a little too silly. Here's to hospitalization number 6.
Where I go to group made me go to the ER because of an increase in suicidal ideation, self harming almost daily, and nonstop anxiety.
The ER itself wasn't bad. My patient sitter was so nice and we had a lot of great conversations I haven't had with previous sitters. Then I transferred to the ABU part of the ER where I had my own room with a TV and watched a SpongeBob marathon.
I got to the...
Posted in Uncategorized
It’s been a while since I have blogged and a lot has happened but honestly I can’t think of most of it at this point so I’m just going to go with the main points.
I am very much not okay. I almost ended up in the hospital because I was incredibly suicidal but I decided to do a partial hospitalization program instead. I had to stop seeing my individual therapist because the insurance won’t cover both at once so I’m hoping she is willing to take me back after I am done or I will be...
I am very much not okay. I almost ended up in the hospital because I was incredibly suicidal but I decided to do a partial hospitalization program instead. I had to stop seeing my individual therapist because the insurance won’t cover both at once so I’m hoping she is willing to take me back after I am done or I will be...
Recent Comments
This made me tear up...
Sending you lots of:hug:...
Posted July 14th 2025 at 12:06 PM by
I'm really sorry you're...
sounds horrible..life...
uh im so sorry you have...
