I feel weighed down lately more than I ever have before
I feel like I am living my life for the people around me, but thats who I am, I am a people pleaser I like the people around me to be happy in hopes of making myself happy
and now im shrinking myself
I just wish that I was as happy with the way my life is as others are happy about the way my life is
Right now its just not me I need to do something thats my own and because I want to on my own terms
Thats...

I haven't been my motorcycle since December when I last dropped it. It was a few days after getting my license and I simply lost control for a split second. But that's all it takes. When I got home that day, my dad was pretty pissed that I dumped the bike and that only added to the guilt. So since then, I haven't picked up my bike in fear of doing more damage to it.

When I got home, I walked past the motorcycle and I felt pretty bad for neglecting it for so long. So I got back on,...

idk where to go...i know im supposed to stay and live but idk if i am able to anymore...i stick out as long as i can and well, i dont think i can stick it out anymore...its way too stressful for me now...im only a teen...i shouldnt be struggling with all the stuff im struggling with right now...hmmm...i am struggling with wether or not to believe God really exists anymore to me or not...just tryin to think he is but its really hard to know he loves me and he really cares that i live a life...