Gotta get on here more. Gotta get off leave by tomorrow. I can't lose my HelpLINK Mentor position. It makes me happy..

I haven't been on lately. Been on leave for about 2 weeks. Had alot going on. I reallyyyy don't know when I'm gonna be able to come back to HelpLINK. And, I reallyyyyyy don't want to lose my HelpLINK Mentor position. I've just been arguing with my mom alot and I can't get on as much as I used to. Ugh...

My mom hates me..
My "friends" hate me...
The people on here probably hate me..
I just don't fit in anywhere.

And, the only enjoyment I get out of my "life" is talking to him. But, he's in college. So, apparently.. I'm not supposed to talk to him according to my mom. And, if she makes me stop talking to him... I'll go back to right where I started.. Trying to kill myself.

Someone help me.. someone save me..

I deserve to be treated better. And, I can't wait 4 more years to get outta here. I admit, I have it pretty great material-wise. But, when you say that when you die of a stroke from you pushing yourself to work too much, that it's my fault and that I'm selfish. Wow. What if you killed over right then and there and then, I blamed myself for it for the rest of my life? You make me feel like shit. Nothing I ever do makes you happy. I almost died back in October. You didn't cry. You looked mad. You...

Grr... I wanna put some of my poetry on here and see what people think. But, I'm so paranoid that someone will steal my poems and take credit for them...

---Hey princess. So im hacking you since my phone was being stupid and idk if you got my text ._. So what I said was (Ugh I dont remember exactly, god im stupid ._.) I miss your smile, I miss your voice, I miss your cute laugh, your cute little accent and that adorable little girl voice you do that makes me smile like an idiot because its just the cutest thing I have ever heard(: I love you for...

Okay, so I'm gonna start posting a song everyday or so that relates to how I feel. Maybe write what's on my mind. Haha RANTING... possibly.


...

I suck at it. Haha.

School tomorrow.. well, tutoring. :/
So much work to do.
Feel sick. Like, I'm gonna puke.
F.M.L.