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Disability 2 (mentions of suicide/self harm)

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Posted May 25th 2022 at 08:44 PM by Ennui.

I had my meeting today to try and get on disability and basically I make too much money right now to even qualify for disability. They immediately told me that my denial letter will be coming in the mail. The point of going on disability would have been so I can leave my job so I can have income without wanting to have a breakdown every time I go to work. I mean, I tried to kill myself and a lot of it was triggered by work. But I make too much money to be disabled. It'd almost be easier to quit my job and then apply, but then I'd have no income at all.

I can't help but feel hopeless. There aren't really any reasonable accommodations work can give me either, since I'm just making phone calls all day. But work in general makes me want to kill myself.

I knew I'd be denied but it still upset me and I cried and wanted to self harm. I still have thoughts of self harm now, and my headache came back so that's always cool.

I ignored some of my responsibilities at work and decided to put them off until tomorrow. It's going to make tomorrow-me hate myself but oh well, I just can't today. I'm also worrying because we have May 30 and June 20 off, and those are Mondays, and the cases are going to pile up and become overwhelming for me.

My friends are telling me to look into other jobs that aren't public health related since I need to drive to do most public health jobs, but I also would need to drive to find a decent not public health job. This job is remote and it's such a pus. But driving is also disabling to me and I don't know how to get past it. My permit expires in August and then I have to pay to take that test again.

I'm also so tired all the time and I don't know if its the Trazodone or my depression. I just feel so hopeless with everything going on and not being able to get any support from any direction.

I just don't know what to do anymore.
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Comments

  1. Old Comment
    WhisperingSilence's Avatar
    could you appeal it ?like go to tribunal hearing or something and submit the evidence that way? it might give you chance to explain to them that you intend to quit your job as its affecting your health and therefore you would have no income? I know here in the UK when it comes to PIP (disability allowance benefit) you can appeal decisions made and go to a tribunal hearing to fight your case.
    permalink
    Posted May 26th 2022 at 01:12 AM by WhisperingSilence WhisperingSilence is offline
  2. Old Comment
    The system really sucks. I'm so sorry to hear this, Dez.
    permalink
    Posted May 26th 2022 at 02:04 PM by Ethereal. Ethereal. is offline
  3. Old Comment
    Golfing girl's Avatar
    I'm so sorry Dez that they are not letting you get your disability. I hope that this changes and then they say yes. Play with your little piggies and they will help pick you up.
    permalink
    Posted May 26th 2022 at 04:45 PM by Golfing girl Golfing girl is offline
 
 
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