Strong Language
Posted August 10th 2011 at 06:18 PM by Troubled_Heart
"You've been in a funny mood all day, not pleasant to be around."
You think? You think I'm in a funny mood? Yeah I am, so what? I have the right to be in a bad mood, I can't keep this pretence up forever can I? No I can't I need a break from it when it gets too tough! If I'm unpleasant to be around, fuck off out the way! I don't give a fuck what you think! Not today, today you could uncover the truth and I wouldn't deny it, any excuse for our 'thing' to be wrecked, so I could abandon you, detach my emotions and make myself souless, let myself rule myself!
"You ought to take a good look at yourself in a mirror and change your attitude young lady."
I know alright... I know! I'm a disgrace, a fucking loser and my emotions are out of controlbut as if I could tell you that, you'd just laugh at me and tell me to get a grip. You think I'm in a bad mood for no reason? Well it's you who should take a look in the mirror, it's you who put me like it and I just couldn't handle it today! You're my mother, apparently you can sense when things are getting me down, you should have known I couldn't cope with it all today, you should have known to leave me be. In fact you should have known about all my troubles, you shouldn't have turned your back when you saw the scars and you saw TH, you knew and did nothing! You cannot tell me to change!
"You haven't made me proud today"
The day I make you proud will be a very bad day indeed. In fact the next time I make you proud, I promise you that's when I go forever. I forget your fucking feelings and I do as I want for a change, I drown in my misery if I need to, I go hyper if I want. I'll come back late and stay up all night on the computer not caring about the noise, that'll make up for every single evening as a child, I would be scared, shaking and sweating but you would always send me back, never comfort me and bring me to tears. it'll make up for the TV being so fucking loud, so I could never sleep and end up afraid!
You think? You think I'm in a funny mood? Yeah I am, so what? I have the right to be in a bad mood, I can't keep this pretence up forever can I? No I can't I need a break from it when it gets too tough! If I'm unpleasant to be around, fuck off out the way! I don't give a fuck what you think! Not today, today you could uncover the truth and I wouldn't deny it, any excuse for our 'thing' to be wrecked, so I could abandon you, detach my emotions and make myself souless, let myself rule myself!
"You ought to take a good look at yourself in a mirror and change your attitude young lady."
I know alright... I know! I'm a disgrace, a fucking loser and my emotions are out of controlbut as if I could tell you that, you'd just laugh at me and tell me to get a grip. You think I'm in a bad mood for no reason? Well it's you who should take a look in the mirror, it's you who put me like it and I just couldn't handle it today! You're my mother, apparently you can sense when things are getting me down, you should have known I couldn't cope with it all today, you should have known to leave me be. In fact you should have known about all my troubles, you shouldn't have turned your back when you saw the scars and you saw TH, you knew and did nothing! You cannot tell me to change!
"You haven't made me proud today"
The day I make you proud will be a very bad day indeed. In fact the next time I make you proud, I promise you that's when I go forever. I forget your fucking feelings and I do as I want for a change, I drown in my misery if I need to, I go hyper if I want. I'll come back late and stay up all night on the computer not caring about the noise, that'll make up for every single evening as a child, I would be scared, shaking and sweating but you would always send me back, never comfort me and bring me to tears. it'll make up for the TV being so fucking loud, so I could never sleep and end up afraid!
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Posted August 10th 2011 at 07:45 PM by Anatidaephobia