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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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peirce_the_kay Offline
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Unhappy help - August 31st 2020, 11:41 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

my parents constantly put me down for my school work and it makes me so fucking suicidal, they literally say i cant do anything right, or up to there expectations, i then say that the are the cause of my depression, yet the dont believe me, they also said that if i ever cut again there sending me to a psych ward, how do i explain to them, that it would be even worse for my mental health.
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Re: help - September 1st 2020, 11:12 PM

Hello and welcome to Teenhelp, thank you so much for joining and telling us about what you have been going through. I am so sorry that you are having a hard time with this and hope that you will be okay soon.

You we're saying how your parents are always putting you down and you have been having a hard time with this and I am so sorry that this is happening to you. When we are going through something we want to have someone like our parents to help us out and not put us down. Would you be able to write a letter to them and put everything in it that you are having trouble with and ask if you can talk to them without everyone getting upset.

Also I have two articles on self harm, when you have time you can look at them and show this to your parents. So that they can understand why someone does this and hopefully they can help you out and understand why you do this. They are, https://www.psycom.net/parent-a-teen-that-self-harms/
and https://youngminds.org.uk/find-help/...ort-self-harm/

Another thing that you can try is if you are in school now, ask if you can talk to the school counselor and have them help you to talk to your parents. School counselors are able to talk to you about anything that you are going through and they can help you to talk to your parents too. When you are getting the feeling to do this, try to get your mind off of this for a while. Reading a book for a while or drawing or painting or writing or putting on a funny movie or TV show or going for a walk or finding something else to do for a while to help you out. I hope that you will be okay soon. Hugs


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Re: help - September 2nd 2020, 06:51 AM

I agreed. You should know their motivations. If you never talk to them, you will never solve this problem.
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Re: help - September 3rd 2020, 01:47 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Golfing girl View Post
Hello and welcome to Teenhelp, thank you so much for joining and telling us about what you have been going through. I am so sorry that you are having a hard time with this and hope that you will be okay soon.

You we're saying how your parents are always putting you down and you have been having a hard time with this and I am so sorry that this is happening to you. When we are going through something we want to have someone like our parents to help us out and not put us down. Would you be able to write a letter to them and put everything in it that you are having trouble with and ask if you can talk to them without everyone getting upset.

Another thing that you can try is if you are in school now, ask if you can talk to the school counselor and have them help you to talk to your parents. School counselors are able to talk to you about anything that you are going through and they can help you to talk to your parents too. When you are getting the feeling to do this, try to get your mind off of this for a while. Reading a book for a while or drawing or painting or writing or putting on a funny movie or TV show or going for a walk or finding something else to do for a while to help you out. I hope that you will be okay soon. Hugs
I have been talking to a counselor at school but i never go into much detail with specifics of such, and ive also tried explaining to them vut they just wont listen, my father grew up in the south in the 60s, and my mother pretty much the same, so they dont listen to anything i say, what do i do
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
Arabesque- golfing girl. Offline
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Re: help - September 3rd 2020, 04:10 PM

Hi, I know that it can be hard to open up and talk about what we are going through now or what has been going on. Sometimes we do not know how to start or we are scared to let someone in. Can you try talking with the school counselor and let them know what you are going through now or what has been going on? If you are having a hard time with this can you try writing a letter and give it to them so that they can read it and help you out. They may even be able to talk to your parents about what you are going through and if they can then maybe your parents will get it and help you out. I hope that you will be okay soon.


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  (#6 (permalink)) Old
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Re: help - September 9th 2020, 10:19 AM

Hi there,

Thank you for reaching out.

I agree with the above users that it would be best for you to talk to them about this. And this isn't an ordinary talk, but rather a heart-to-heart talk where you describe everything you're going through. Tell them about the unhealthy pressure you're being put through regarding schoolwork, and tell them that it is devastating your mental health.

I understand that it must be really hard to speak on matters like this with parents, but remember that the way you say it makes all the difference. For effective communication (i.e. if you want them to get your message), you need to adopt a patient tone while you're talking to them. Speaking in an accusatory tone will not help you and will frustrate you even more, especially when they begin to get angry. So I'd advise you to ask them if they can find a time that's convenient for them when you all can have a chat. Sit them down and tell them everything that's going on. Seek their understanding and request them to be speak to you kindly, and to not have unhealthy expectations of you.

If you prefer, you can first meet your school counsellor. Tell them all that's going on, and see if the counsellor can arrange for a meeting. If you, the counsellor and your parents are able to meet together, you might be able to get a productive conversation going, after which they'll hopefully change their ways.

Take care, and feel free to DM me if you have anything you'd like to speak about!! I know this is a really tough time, but remember that you're not alone in your struggle. Thousands have been through this, and thousands will go through this in the future. It's unfortunate that we live in a world where we're often surrounded by people who intentionally or unintentionally put us down, but remember that the world is not bleak ultimately and that there are a lot of amazing people out there. Good times will come, wait for them
  (#7 (permalink)) Old
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Re: help - September 17th 2020, 11:46 AM

Unfortunately, parents are different. Not everyone understands that their child's success depends on how they support and inspire him. Such people do not understand that humiliation cannot form good self-esteem in a child. At the same time, such until the end of their days will be sure that they did everything right, they just turned out bad children. I say this from the experience of my second cousin, who was bullied by her parents for every little thing. And at one point she began to spend more and more time with us. She once confessed to me that my mother was more of a mother for her during this difficult period than her own mother. I hope you are not in the same situation, but with your story, the story of our family immediately came to my mind.
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