Triggering: cutting,purging,dead...and weather

TRIGGERING FOR SELF-HARM, EATING DISORDER, AND SUICIDE, AND BAD LANGUAGE

I want to cut so badly right now. I am so fucking disgusted with myself it's not even funny. I went to Chilis and ate a lot then I had frozen yogurt after words now my stomach is full and all I want to do is purge and cut. I need to be punished for eating so much. Ugh I just wish I was dead already so I wouldn't have to go through all of this shit.



It's getting colder out which means it is long sleeve and sweatshirt time which makes not cutting so much harder for me.

[Skatergirl]

Don't be so hard on yourself when you over eat food. That is no reason to cut. There is never a reason to cut.
Stop being so worried about your body. Relax, and enjoy life. Be thankful for your body. Look at all the people who aren't healthy, and they have so many problems with their body, because they were born that way.
You are beautiful. There is no need to tear yourself apart for eating too much.
This world is so harsh. Don't listen to the media lies. You don't need to be skinny to be beautiful. No one is perfect. Everyone is different, and that's what makes you so special.

[Palmolive]

Hi there,

I've said this to a few people before, but food is a right, not a privilege. What if everyone in the world thought that eating was something that is disgusting and that when we do eat, we deserve to be punished? It's way of life, it's a way to stay well, healthy and nourished. Food is a need, not a want and you definitely have no reason to be punished for eating.

Have you tried doing something such as writing, art, sport etc to help yourself express your emotions? I know that writing really helps me to express myself. Sometimes, when I similar to the way you feel, I write it out all out. Make it external not internal and just express myself by writing. And then after, I distract. Because sometimes expressing ourselves alone, doesn't take away the urges you know? It can do so much but when we put the pen down for example, its easy for us to go back to the urges and thoughts we were having before so it might be good to do something to distract yourself to let your feelings pass over time. And they pass. Time can be a healer.

I used to think it would be easier not to cut during the months with hotter weather. I was wrong. If you want to cut yourself that badly, the weather and time of year won't stop you. Nothing will stop. And the only person who can stop you is you. At the end of the day, if you're wanting to cut yourself and you're determined to do so, you will. If you start to challenge your thoughts because you don't want to live a life of self harm any more, you can change your behaviour which will influence the actions you take.

Just remember you're worth a lot more than the pain you are putting yourself through and that you're not alone. You never will be,

Jessie