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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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How do you tell a friend that you self harm? - November 1st 2013, 11:15 AM

Hi I was wondering if anyone could help me? A couple of weeks ago one of my closest friend noticed a scar on my arm and asked if i was ok. I completely freaked out and denied everything but they seemed generally concerned. After thinking about it afterwards I think it would be a good idea to tell them as they have helped me through a lot before and i could use their support.
I have a couple of questions like how should i tell them and what should i say?
What should i do if they have a bad reaction?
Could it effect our friendship?
Would it put to much stress or pressure on them?
And is it a good idea to tell them?
Thanks.
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Re: How do you tell a friend that you self harm? - November 1st 2013, 05:54 PM

Hi there,
Firstly welcome to TeenHelp
You could have a look at this article which explains how to tell someone you self harm. If you felt you couldn't actually tell your friend then you could write them a letter, you could either request a written response or sit there whilst they read it.
Also, you could refer your friend to this article which may help them understand self harm better.
Good luck with telling them, I'm always here if you want to talk Hope this helps.


I'm here if anyone wants to talk, I'm always here. Feel free to VM or PM me
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Re: How do you tell a friend that you self harm? - November 1st 2013, 06:53 PM

Thanks for the quick reply :-).
The article was a big help and i have a clearer idea of what i should say.
Sorry for so many questions but would email or text be not personal enough as i don't think i could say it face to face very easily.
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Re: How do you tell a friend that you self harm? - November 1st 2013, 10:03 PM

Hello Meg, text or email would be perfectly fine as long as you're sure your friend will see it. All that matters is that you tell him/her. I know it's a very hard thing to do, especially face-to-face. Texting or emailing would be a great idea as you can forward her the article Jenny posted above so that they can understand self harm better and process their initial emotions before seeing you. When you see your friend, if they don't bring it up themselves, you can ask them if they got your email/text and then go from there.
You are a very strong person to be seeking help, it is a very hard, perhaps the hardest, part of recovery for self-harm. Or anything, really. I hope that all goes well and wish you the best of luck. <3


HAPPINESS is just waiting for me to take it; I truly believe that now.
~SCARS
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Re: How do you tell a friend that you self harm? - November 1st 2013, 10:29 PM

Thanks for the advice. I feel a lot more confident about the whole thing. Iv been putting it of for a while because i just didnt know how to put what i wanted to say into words. Everything seems a lot clearer now and i think i can do it. :-)
Also i just wanted to thank everyone for being so kind and accepting. Its also made me feel like i can talk about problems ect that Im facing with out being judged or looked down on.
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Re: How do you tell a friend that you self harm? - November 3rd 2013, 12:01 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Meg_01 View Post
Thanks for the quick reply :-).
The article was a big help and i have a clearer idea of what i should say.
Sorry for so many questions but would email or text be not personal enough as i don't think i could say it face to face very easily.
Your welcome
As Jade said telling by email or text would be ok, it could help you tell her if you felt you couldn't actually do it. Best of luck with it, feel free to contact me if you want to talk more about it


I'm here if anyone wants to talk, I'm always here. Feel free to VM or PM me
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