Rape

[Becky95]

My sister is 14. She's disabled with severe learning difficulties and the mental age of a 6 year old. A few week ago she was raped by someone at the youth club she attends. She hasn't been affected by the rape as she doesn't understand what happened, which in a way is good as she isn't suffering.
I've held it together and stayed strong to help my mum and dad through and to help my sister through all the procedures that have followed the rape but now I just feel lonely and helpless. I can't go out with my friends and find it difficult to attend college as the thought of what happened just eats away at me. I've tried talking to my friends but every time I mention it I get angry at them because they don't understand what I'm going through.
I've considered going for counselling but I feel like others will think I'm overreacting to everything and I don't fancy spilling my heart out to someone I don't know. But then I don't fancy spilling my heart out to someone I know.

I don't know what to do ...

[Apple Orchard Ghost]

Counseling is fantastic. I think it would really help you. A counselor's job is to help you make sense of things and then make them better. They won't ever think you're overreacting or push you to talk about things you don't want to. Also, they won't tell anyone what you tell them. It's their job to listen to people when they're sad about something.

[Storyteller.]

Hey Becky.

What happened is absolutely horrible, and it's understandable that you'd be feeling the way you are. I don't think you're overreacting, and I think it could really help to talk to a good counsellor. What your family has gone through is scary and stressful, and having someone non-judgemental to talk to about it can help you get through it. It sucks that your friends aren't being much help, but like you said they may just be unable to understand what's happened. Is there perhaps one friend you're closer to, whom you could approach individually and talk to? Or maybe you could try talking to your parents - they lived through the same nightmare you did, after all. Whatever you do, remember that you're not alone, and that it's not going to help to pretend to be stoic and hold everything in.

Take care.

Hey there,

Firstly, I am sorry about what happened. I know that there are no magical words that can make it better though. Secondly, I think that sometimes people think that if you were not the one abused you haven't been affected by it but the fact is that the family members and friends can be affected by it as well. So, no matter what other people might be saying I believe what you are feeling is completely normal. I know that my family felt the aftermath of my abuse and are still dealing with it, you know? Yes, there are going to be friends that are not helpful but that doesn't make what you are going through any less real.

I think that counseling would be a great help to you; I understand you worries regarding it but in the end I think most counselors would be able to help you work out your feelings. It might take time to start trusting the person but once you do start trusting them you could really work on the feelings you are having. A counselor can hear what you are saying and help you find the tools to cope with it.

I think talking to your parents could be a great way to handle it however there is a chance they will not be receptive to that so go into that with caution. So, maybe you could try talking to them and explain to them that you are struggling with what happened to your sister and then see if they are willing to talk to you about it. Start out with baby steps and go from there. Maybe you could write down what you want to say so you don't get flustered and forget what you want to say. Also, if other family members know what have happened maybe you could try approaching them? A cousin you are close to or an aunt?

I hope that this helped and if you need anything please feel free to PM/VM me.