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Rape and Abuse If you or someone you know is being abused in any way and you need support or advice, don't hesitate to reach out to us here.

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The sad one. Offline
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....Is this rape....? - November 1st 2010, 04:49 AM

I'm in junior high and I'm not doing so well with my grades and since my mother doesn't like me in the house I go ovver to my older step sisters house to studyand since nobody is ever there but me and her she makes me do things... very bad things... you know... right....
She took my virginity and I feal that its weird that I've already had sex since I'm in 7th grade.
I also keep having nightmares and flashbacks about it and they feal real.
The reason I can't tell anyone about this is that it's EXTREMELY hard to talk to adults for me because of the child abuse I went through. I don't have real life freinds and I'm starting to cut myself.
   
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Re: ....Is this rape....? - November 1st 2010, 05:17 AM

Hey. Well if you lost your virginity to her, then yes. That is rape.

There are some people that have had sex in the 7th grade. Maybe not too many, but it does happen. It's completely normal to be uncomfortable talking about things like this, but if you try to talk about it, the results will be great. It sounds like this is really taking a lot out of you and scaring you a lot, and you should get help. Just keep trying to tell an adult.


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Re: ....Is this rape....? - November 2nd 2010, 01:54 AM

You said she 'makes' you. So yes. This is rape. And the flashbacks confirm this further.

Find an adult you trust and tell them .. things will get better when you're out of that abusive situation.

*EDIT* and it isn't you fault this happened to you at such a young age. I was about your age and in a sorta similar situation.
   
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Re: ....Is this rape....? - November 6th 2010, 07:21 PM

that is rape. and you have got to stop cutting yourself, your so young and thats a hard habbit to break. you've gotta talk about this to someone soon, i hope things get better
   
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Re: ....Is this rape....? - November 7th 2010, 01:51 AM

It's rape. If she makes you, then yes, it's rape.

You should try to talk to an adult if you can. It's so hard, trust me, I know, but a trusted adult can help you so it stops. Nightmares and flashbacks can be a result of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder or Rape Trauma Syndrome, both of which can be helped. And, while Self-Injury feels like a legitimate way to handle your pain, it is a hard habit to break and one that feels almost impossible to free yourself from.

I urge you to seek help from someone you trust. A teacher, a parent? Anyone.
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Re: ....Is this rape....? - November 7th 2010, 03:54 AM

Hey,

To answer your first question, yes, that is indeed rape. It doesn't matter if it's a family member, friend, or stranger, if they are making you have sex with them and it's unwanted, than that is rape, and it's not okay.

I know that it may be hard for you to seek some help from an adult, but I strongly encourage you to. You can't keep going on and keeping this in, because the flashbacks will never stop if you're not taken out of the situation. I think that maybe going to talk to your school counselor would be a really good idea, or even talking to a teacher that you trust. They will be able to help you in a better way than we can. I know it seems hard to do, and that it's scary, but it will be for your benefit. You can not be stuck in this situation.

About the cutting, this is in no way your fault. You can't control the people around you, and harming yourself will not get you anywhere. Cutting is very dangerous and it can easily be lead into many more things. I started cutting in seventh grade and it grew into an addiction. I thought it would help me, I thought it took away reality, but it doesn't. And later on, you'll have to look back on those scars, and you'll feel the very emotion that you felt when you put the scar there. Trust me, you don't want to carry around this emotion for the rest of your life. Cutting is so very dangerous.

Please, please, please, talk to someone about this. Not only about your sister, but also the self-harm. Anyone that you feel safe talking to. A teacher. The principal. The counselor. Just anyone. Please get some help.

If you ever need anything, or want someone to talk to, you can always message me. I hope that you take care of yourself.

- Kaylaaa.


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and when life gets too hard to face on your own.
I will stand as a light through the darkness unknown,
I will walk with you, so you're never alone.
   
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Re: ....Is this rape....? - November 7th 2010, 05:43 AM

That's rape. You need to get out of that situation ASAP. I know it seems scary, but trust me, you'll feel better about it in the future. Hang in there, things will pick back up. PM/VM me anytime you'd like.
Toz


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