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Death and Grieving Coping with loss is difficult at any age, but you are not alone during this difficult time. Reach out to other users in this forum.

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sugasuga2016 Offline
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Boyfriend's grandfather - November 23rd 2014, 02:09 AM

About a few months ago, my boyfriend's grandfather passed away after a stroke. He has been doing well this whole time but tonight he went to his grandma's house to celebrate thanksgiving with her. I was not there but he told me that he went through his grandpa's clothes and ties, and took a few home. He sent me a text when he got back home, and i could tell he was upset. I hurt when he hurts, and i want to try and make him feel better, but I don't know what to say. What do i do?
   
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Re: Boyfriend's grandfather - November 23rd 2014, 04:42 AM

Healing from loss takes time. Going to dinner probably brought back memories for him, as did going through his grandfather's old things. Anyway, I don't really think there is anything you can do that would take away his sadness. It is a natural part of grieving and only a state of acceptance brought about by his own mind can help him. However, the best thing for friends and family of someone grieving can do is to be there for them. I would suggest making sure that your boyfriend knows that he can always come to you when he wants to talk or when he feels sad. Support him as he goes through rough times and let him know that things will get easier.


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Re: Boyfriend's grandfather - November 23rd 2014, 04:45 AM

It's really nice of you to be supportive of your boyfriend. Sometimes going through a deceased loved one's possessions can be helpful to people. Encourage him to express his feelings; you could ask the about the significance of the ties he chose to bring home. If he has any pictures of his grandfather, he could make a scrap book or a document/poster to remember him by. See if you can get him to write a letter as though he's writing it to his grandfather as that's a good way to get some closure. I think the best thing you can do is to offer to listen when he needs to talk. Just being there to listen can do him a world of good.


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Re: Boyfriend's grandfather - November 23rd 2014, 04:06 PM

take him outside , make him food , talk a lot and encourage him on outside activities and dealing with friends a lot.
   
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