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Peer Pressure and Bullying Social pressure can take many different forms, including intimidation, bullying and even physical attacks. If you feel you could be a victim or perpetrator (who wishes to stop) of bullying, talk about it here.

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Am i getting bullied by my friend? - June 13th 2012, 01:04 PM

Hello there. Well my question is to know whether i am getting bullied or not. And I want you to say things that would make me feel better and what to do.
(NOTE : I've been taking the anti-depressant lustral, for 2 weeks now, just started)

So In school i have a group of close friends, i have my best friend in that group too and he is a great guy. Anyway We are 5 friends and chill/hang out together in school. Well There is this guy in our friend group, he is known as the "joker" of the group because he is really silly and all that. He talks a LOT etc. And the weird part is, sometimes he puts one of us down, and make fun. Not just me, he puts some of us down all the time when he is bored. He says stuff like "fat,gay,lol wtf is he doing what a idiot retard" stuff like this.

None of my friends stand up and say dude stop putting us down.. what a bitch.. So One day I decided to do it. I stood up when he said "go fuckyourself fat retard". I asked him to stop doing and saying stuff like this, i asked him to stop putting us down. WelL he said "lol, you are being a little girl again.." ( NOTE : He has been taking anti-depressants for 1.5 years, he was depressed once ago )

Sometimes he is a great guy who you can talk with. He kinda differs from others, he knows more about the world than others and we have a lot of fun chat with him. But whenever he gets bored a bit (or whenever we meet up with other friends ) he starts putting someone down. But actually he is a good guy that you can talk to.

So am i really being a little girl? Or is he really bullying me? Please answer me. As I told you I'm the only one between my friends that takes these insults serious, so i stand up and ask him to gtfo. But I always get the same response : Stop being a little bitch.
Am i seriously being a little girl? Should i stop being friends with him? What should i do???
   
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Re: Am i getting bullied by my friend? - June 13th 2012, 02:33 PM

I don't think you're 'being a little girl' at all. This guy is meant to be your friend and occasionally, friends might mess around and insult each other a little but what you've said he has said isn't funny and if he doesn't it all the time, it's taking it too far and it isn't right that you and your friends just let him do it. Chances are if he is doing it when you're around certain people, he might be trying to show off in front of him and act big which is why he is a nice guy most of the time, apart from when you see certain friends.

Have you spoken to any of your other friends about it to see how they feel? Maybe if more of you stand up to him and tell him to stop, he won't respond by insulting you and he might actually listen and he knows it's getting to a few of you rather than just one of you.
   
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Re: Am i getting bullied by my friend? - June 14th 2012, 06:03 PM

actually I have already talked with my other friends...
One of them says we should kick him out of our friend group and the other one says lets just llet him hang out with us he is just being an asshole thats him and we have to accept him.
Well Should i leave my friend group if they are going to let that guy hang out with us?
   
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Re: Am i getting bullied by my friend? - June 14th 2012, 06:05 PM

By the way i also wanna say that I used to insult him back, and i used to make fun of him too when he put me down but I am bored of doing it but he isnt
   
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Re: Am i getting bullied by my friend? - June 14th 2012, 06:06 PM

Maybe i might just stop hanging out with him as much as i do. Maybe i would start being serious to him and ignore him a bit, and remove from my good friends list.
   
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Re: Am i getting bullied by my friend? - June 14th 2012, 09:43 PM

If what he is saying to you upsets you then, technically it is bullying. You should talk with him and explain that if he doesnt stop making you feel this way and basically grow up, your all friends, that you may have to not asscoite with him anymore.

Btw you arent a silly little girl





   
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Re: Am i getting bullied by my friend? - June 16th 2012, 06:07 AM

It's understandable why he tells you to stop being a little girl because you used to insult him in the same manner, which only added fuel to the fire but now you can no longer take the heat. In other words, it fits the old adage (I'm para-phrasing), if you can give insults then you should be able to take insults.

The question of whether or not it's bullying comes down to what you define as bullying. I don't consider bullying to include saying or doing negative things to others. Instead, I consider bullying to be saying or doing negative things over and over to certain individuals with the primary purpose of hurting them. For me, the question becomes whether he wants to hurt your friends and you, or whether he's mostly joking. If it's the former, then he's a bully with an incredibly poor vocabulary who often is bored with his friends. Overall, it's probably not a good fit. If it's the latter, then he's an asshole with an incredibly poor vocabulary.

If you leave a bunch of friends due to just one person, it will imply those friends aren't worth as much compared to the one guy. It's certainly possible for him to be part of the group of friends but for you to not befriend him.


I can rip you off, and steal all your cash, suckerpunch you in the face, stand back and laugh. Leave you stranded as fast as a heart-attack.
- Danko Jones (I Think Bad Thoughts)
   
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