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Why Me? Here is a safe space to let it all out, where you can rant about all the bad things life throws your way. Sometimes it just helps to ask "why me?"
Re: Complaint of the Day 2 -
November 12th 2020, 12:38 PM
I need to fucking kill myself. If it's still not better by mid-December, I'm fucking leaving. Same date I set like 5 months ago. Haven't fucking changed my mind because shit just keeps fucking getting worse every fucking day I'm unfortunately still alive for some damn reason. I don't even care. And there's no one left to care.
"Just open your eyes and see that life is beautiful..." ~Sixx:A.M.
Re: Complaint of the Day 2 -
November 13th 2020, 06:35 AM
Life sucks...I’m failing school, I have a hefty medical bill, I’m broke af, I lost my job..ugh I wanna die
"I'm not a piece of cake for you to just discard
While you walk away with the frosting of my heart
So I'm taking back what's mine, you'll miss
The slice of heaven that I gave to you last night." - "Cake" by Melanie Martinez
Re: Complaint of the Day 2 -
November 14th 2020, 12:17 PM
As far as I see it I have two options:
1. Keep my work hours as they are, have panic attacks the night before work, panic attacks at work, cry a lot, but have a reason to leave the house and function as a semi-normal person
2. Halve my hours and go back to just weekends so I'm not so stressed and not so anxious, but potentially end up more depressed and alone than before, with no motivation to get out of bed, and potentially stop functioning as a semi-normal person
Re: Complaint of the Day 2 -
November 17th 2020, 02:05 PM
The flashbacks make me extremely suicidal in the past time, and there's no way to know what's real and what's not. There's no advice for me because the first step is recognizing it's a flashback, and that's impossible.
"Just open your eyes and see that life is beautiful..." ~Sixx:A.M.
Re: Complaint of the Day 2 -
November 17th 2020, 05:16 PM
Dissociating hard and no one cares. I need to drive, so I have no choice but to push through when I probably shouldn't. There's no one here. All alone. At least dissociation is better than flashbacks. Though some of my flashbacks are to when I had to dissociate my way through the trauma I couldn't escape. I'm losing my mind here in the car. Waiting to see if it'll be safer to drive soon. If this passes. Will it end? When will it end? Where am I? How did I get here? Where do I go? No where is safe. I can't escape? How long have I been here? Does anyone care at all?
"Just open your eyes and see that life is beautiful..." ~Sixx:A.M.
Re: Complaint of the Day 2 -
November 20th 2020, 12:17 PM
No disability, no help. I feel like I’ve been given up on. Feel hopeless. My mental illness feels invalid. Is it cause I’m afraid that others don’t want to see my pain? I want to hurt myself and hurt someone. I feel such anger at myself and people for making me this way.
"I'm not a piece of cake for you to just discard
While you walk away with the frosting of my heart
So I'm taking back what's mine, you'll miss
The slice of heaven that I gave to you last night." - "Cake" by Melanie Martinez
Re: Complaint of the Day 2 -
November 25th 2020, 10:07 PM
It's my birthday in a few days. Maybe I'll do something for myself for once and end this suffering for good. Happy birthday to me; I'm going to kill myself.
"Just open your eyes and see that life is beautiful..." ~Sixx:A.M.
Re: Complaint of the Day 2 -
December 15th 2020, 11:11 AM
The back of my neck is well and truly stiff from carrying all that shopping on my back yesterday. I suppose I could consider it a pre-workout workout for today.