Really don't know what I'm doing anymore. I worked so hard on my 8 page booklet for college and took it through for mum and dad to look at to see if they thought anything needed changed, mum just got mad at me asking why I'm trying so hard if I don't even want to be doing the course anyway. This morning she was texting me telling me she didn't want me falling behind.
I don't know what I want to do after this year. I don't know what I want to do for the rest of my life. I don't see anything...

Ugh... Oldness... Decisions... Impossible
Been given the A-Level book, have to decide what to do with life...
How on earth am I meant to decide?
16 subjects to choose from... 4 subjects to do...
Not sure how to choose, don't know what I want to do...
Same grades all round... Hate/Like all subjects the same...
IDIOT!

I wander if I should give up, not do A-Levels, not go to uni and just be a loser.
That would be easy... That would suit me fine....

I don't think I am strong.
I seriously doubt the whole concept.
I cry everyday when I am home.
Nothing goes right.
I seriously can't go left.
I'm screwed up.
But I am trying.
I suppose that is what you call "strong"

But I'm not.

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