Last week I had a job interview for Matalan (clothes/homeware shop for those of you who are deprived ) and I got the job! It's going to be 8+ hours a week until Christmas, and then they'll decide if they want to keep me on or not. Funny since, when the trainer person was showing the group of us around the store and pointing things out, I was looking at the homeware we walked past and thinking how reasonably priced it is and that I'd totally shop in there when I move out.

Now, less...

I am ready to give up the fight i honestly dont know why or how im still here after last night. I cut so much last night. I was crying and shaking and hyperventilating last night. I hit rock bottom yesterday and i dont nor will i continue on anymore. i cant handle anything anymore. im just done. I cannot do this anymore its either i let myself do it slowly or do it fast and by my own hands. i just feel so alone and so unwanted. i feel dead inside. I AM SO FUCKING DONE.