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I haven't really been around much. I haven't really done anything, well anything worth while. I haven't been coping at all recently. Things hit me pretty hard Friday. I finished school for good, well apart from exams if I'm even still alive to sit them. I guess it hit me that she's really gone. Like I know it was last year but I remember it like it was a minute ago and I'm so tired of replaying the whole situation in my head. Desperately wanting someone to hold me and let me cry and just be there....

Lately I've been wondering how much I can really affect anyone's life. I mean people say that they want to really make a difference and I'd like that even if it was just with one person but I'm not really sure if I could ever be that person who brightens anyone's day or helps anyone. I try my best to be there for everyone that means a lot for me and I'd do anything I can to help them when they're struggling, upset or anything. I' m always nice to people and I try my beat to be happy and friendly...