I normally write everything out on Wattpad but the update made it go all shitty. On Wattpad, my not so private diary is on there for people to read, I put in the date and the time I start writing it. Wattpad isn't cooperating with me so I'm writing on here instead. I neeeeeeed to write.

Today 3 years ago, I attempted suicide. It was my fourth attempt in like 2 years. I had a tough time, struggling with loads of things - my anxiety, my depression, my self harms, my paranoia and to...

I didn't get the teacher aide position that I really wanted and I feel really annoyed, stupid, worthless, useless. I don't even know if I have a future. My parents found me crying, and my dad being the Christian he is, told me that God knows my future, He knows how my future is going to turn out. God knows how my future is gonna turn out but what if in my future, I'm not alive but dead. My parents are always saying that if you have an issue or a problem, you turn to the bible and it will always...

Im lost. I don't know where I am or where to go from here. I need someone to help me but I reject those who help me. I don't see myself living in the next five or ten years. I just see myself barely living in the present. Isn't that sad? I don't see myself having some sort of happy future where I'm married or somewhere. I just see me as a 22 year old slowly fading away.

Every night I'm in bed and I look outside my giant bedroom window and I get amazed with the night sky. I appreciate...

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