Congratulate me, I haven't been arrested or detained or had any contact with the police.

I went for a walk last night, but bearing in mind that I want my license back, I deliberately didn't do anything to get noticed. Sure I sat in a cemetery and SH'd, but it wasn't bad, because I realised I didn't have any tissues and didn't want to ruin my shirt. I sat longer waiting for it to dry before walking home, and whilst I was waiting I got to watch a hedgehog for a while. Hedgehogs are...

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"Change the voices in your head, make them like you instead."

I don't have voices in my head. I often get asked if I do . . . I don't. I have ideas, and plans, and urges . . . but they all come from me. Not some "other" thing. Just me. Which I suppose makes me somewhat sicker . . . I don't know.

I tore apart a razor because my old blades are blunt. I tore. Apart. A razor.
Ladies, (gents?) I am not well. I do not know what to do.
Everyday...

Keri came over this morning. Didn't ask anything about the hoodie. Said I was clearly shattered. Offered to come over again later. I declined.

Last night, I'd just fallen asleep, and there was really loud knocking on the door. I didn't want to get it, but it kept going on for ages, so I went to my window at roughly the same time as my flatmate answered the door. It was the police. It was 2am. I was like, whafuck? And my flatmate felt the same. Turns out the guy that used to live here...

It is hot. It is humid. It is summer.
My washing is in the machine.
I got new shorts and a singlet.
I didn't buy much as far as groceries go because I haven't been hungry, and to be honest, what's the point of buying food if you're not going to eat it?

My sleep is all over the place. Some nights I sleep in excess of 10 or 12 hours. Some nights (like last night) it feels like I don't sleep at all. The weather doesn't help. Taking my meds sometimes helps, but I've...

Was yesterday. Haha, yup, I live in the future for most of you :P

It was a pretty good day. I got up, had a shower, then left for Mum's place. Got off the bus, and got drenched walking from the bus stop to Mum's, to the point that even though my hair is really short, it was literally dripping down on my face.

Got there, PRESENTS! Haha. I asked for chocolate . . . I got . . .
A lava-lamp from my sister (so cool, I've always wanted one but forgot . . . she remembered)....

I complain about horrendous period pain (it really is, it practically cripples me), and decide I will go to the doctor to get something to help, as regular painkillers just make me hurl, and then, when my period finishes, I completely forget, until I get the next one. And right now I'm laughing at that ridiculous run-on sentence.

On the bright side, I knew it was due around Christmas and I asked everybody for chocolate. The result is that I should be able to handle the sweet food...

After more than two years, it shouldn't affect me anymore. There should be no nostalgia and no regret, because I know so fully that I'm better off without her. I was going through old photos tonight, photos of the two of us. I thought I looked fit, attractive, and well adjusted. I thought SHE looked overweight with bad skin and a slutty dress sense.

I started to question why I still stayed with her, even after she cheated. And I remembered having NO self-esteem whilst I was with her,...

I don't know what to do with them!
My community support worker, Leisa, is getting me stuff I don't have (using flexifund) pretty much just because she can. I feel weird about it. I mean it's really nice, but this is stuff that I would usually wait ages and ages to get. And furthermore, it's not cheap stuff either, and it's for the most part exactly the same as what I would choose for myself. I had pretty much no say in the matter. She just decided she was doing it.

So I'm getting...

I did not sleep at all last night. Maybe 30 - 45 minutes around 7, but pretty much not at all. It was the heat. It was a consistent 22 degrees ALL night (celsius, this is), with about 80% humidity. My brain and my body just went, nope, we're not complying.

As a result I've spent most of today in a barely-awake haze. I'm so completely exhausted. Leisa said I wasn't to have an afternoon nap because then I wouldn't sleep tonight, and I was sorely tempted, especially as my flatmate had...