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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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self harm on vacation? - May 19th 2015, 12:01 AM

hello everyone!
i am a self harmer who gets really on edge, irritated and depressed if i don't harm for a day or two. in july of this year, i hope to visit my girlfriend who lives a state away for about a week. i told her that i wouldn't bring my razors. i don't even want to bring them because i don't want to have her deal with it, but i also want to be pleasant while i'm there.

i'm not sure what to do. does anyone have any experience with anything like this? are there helpful and conspicuous alternatives?
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Re: self harm on vacation? - May 19th 2015, 01:40 AM

Hi there,

I think not bringing your razors could be a really great start to quitting self harm totally! You will have a week without your razors, which means a week without self harm. In that time you may start to realize that you don't need to self harm to cope with things and you may even develop better coping mechanisms so you don't need to self harm at all.

You may want to talk with your girlfriend and make an action plan with her. For example, would you be able to talk to her about what's going on when you get an urge? Talking things through may help. Maybe if the area is safe you can take a walk to clear your mind, or go for a run or do other forms of exercise to release stress.

Maybe you can think of fun things to do to distract yourself and take up some time. Maybe you can watch some movies or play some games with your girlfriend, or maybe you two can go out somewhere so you can get away from the situation and have a breather.

I think it's important to talk to your girlfriend about this though, because maybe you two can come up with things together!

-Dez


   
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Re: self harm on vacation? - May 19th 2015, 06:41 AM

Fortunately, July is long enough away you can plan for it! I think that you could minimize your self harm now in the effort to eventually be able to go a week without it! You mention getting irritable without Self Harm, can you think of anything you could do that's safe and effective?

Maybe come up with a plan. What I mean is that have alternatives to self harm that help you feel better in place just in case on your trip. When I'm feeling triggered to Self Harm I reach out to people, I write, listen to music, play a game, etc. Because you're going on vacation, and this should be a relatively happy time for you, find some distractions to go to when you need them. Also, keep yourself busy. Seeing your girlfriend will be amazing for you, maybe she can show you around and has fun things set aside for you to do.

Bottom line is, trying talking to your girlfriend about your fears. It will be hard, but I'm sure she really cares about you, and is looking forward to you visiting. You might be surprised at how much someone can help. And it's okay to lean on people, so let her in! She might have awesome ideas that can help as well.


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Re: self harm on vacation? - May 19th 2015, 08:26 AM

Hi there.

I agree with the above users. This could be a really brilliant opportunity for you to try and stop self harming because while you are away, you will be able to prove to yourself that you can cope and get through the days with out hurting yourself and that's going to be a wonderful feeling and a wonderful achievement too.

But if you're worried about it, do put a plan in place with your girlfriend. So that when you have urges, you have a selection of things to do to help you get through that moment and to get through those urges. And you can do it. You can get through those urges and take this as the first step because you're going to be with your girlfriend all week whom I'm guessing will be very supportive and be able to help you through any difficult moments that you do have. So be honest with her while you're there too. She loves you and wants to support you through this so don't suffer in silence while you are away, okay?

I know its hard and scary but take baby steps and take it day by day. You can do this and we're always here for you too.

Jessie


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Re: self harm on vacation? - May 19th 2015, 02:06 PM

I went totally insane without SH too. Meds really helped me a lot. I am really thank full for them. I would lookinto it if I were you.

And maybe you could do regular other things to vent the feeling. Take a quick run, journal, stim (if you do that, I hope you do) But do anything you can to release little bits of of pent up emotions reguraly. Bring a rubber band if needed and snap that often maybe it can release the need to self harm a little at a time. But I'd only do that as last resort. Good luck


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