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Rape and Abuse If you or someone you know is being abused in any way and you need support or advice, don't hesitate to reach out to us here.

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heather2010 Offline
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Question RAPE - May 8th 2009, 08:56 PM

Im pressing charges against a guy for rape right now and im getting praonoid cuz he gets to be out of jail till june his court date and everything.And i was wondering has anyone ever pressed charges against someone for rape ?and how did it go like court and everything? did you have to be there? Was it diffcult ? Umm im 17 and the guy was 21 which means its having sex with a minor i live in virginia and the one website i went to said that a minor in the eyes of a court can not consent to having sex with an adult .The one thing that is scareing me is the fact he might do it to someone else and nobody would know between the time of the cout date adn im very scared of him and court systems but if anyone could answer theses questions for me that would be of great help.
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Re: RAPE - May 8th 2009, 09:05 PM

im not shur wut it is like i hav never raped eny body so ya but it will be ok im shur that he will be to scard to do eny thang and im shur that your father will protect u if this man triys enythang and if your scard to go out then sraund yourself with frends thay will help u if ned be unles thay arnt tru frends.

but if u need somone to talk to im heer
   
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Re: RAPE - May 8th 2009, 09:14 PM

Hello. I don't have a lot of experience in the matter; however I do know that the legal system is flawed. If the court is allowing him to roam free for a few months, there is something seriously wrong.

Perhaps he won't assault anyone, mainly because if he gets found out (which very well might happen if people find out about the case), the persun may come forth. I hope that at the very least he has taken that into account.

If you are worried, maybe a privet detective would be a good idea? Again, I have next to no knowledge in this field, but the precaution might be worth it.

Good luck! You are very brave to be doing this. I wish you the best, and bid you to stay strong!


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Re: RAPE - May 8th 2009, 09:19 PM

See the detective said that they have to take it to so many court dates to show that the have enough evidence to make it too the biggest court date which means its the last straw meaning you cant go higher in the court system i didnt have vidence that he raped me i just had my story adn the detective talked to the guy that did it and the detective said he basicly got him to say everything i said in a nutshell and basically got him to confess he raped me ...i dont understand the law and thats why im asking bout the court thing and stuff
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Re: RAPE - May 8th 2009, 09:33 PM

Okay. I may be able to help you (I read legal crap in my spare time). Could you tell me what answers you want specifically?


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heather2010 Offline
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Re: RAPE - May 8th 2009, 09:58 PM

Will he be put in jail as soon as they decide his charges? Thats the main one i want to know and thank you
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Re: RAPE - May 8th 2009, 10:12 PM

http://www.dcjs.virginia.gov/victims.../saVictims.pdf

The above may help.

The sentence will usually be imposed at the end of the trial (for a misdemeanor). Felony bench trials will usually have sentences imposed at a later date.

When one is sentenced, they will commence their servitude immediately after.

Good luck again. Stay strong. This takes an amazing amount of courage, and I am proud of you.


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Re: RAPE - May 9th 2009, 12:21 AM

hey heather,

well i live in maryland but im not sure if they are the same and plus when i had to go to court i was 8, 9, and 11.

i never actually went into the room with the men but my parents would go in and i would be in a room and they would question me about the things they said and stuff

but that may not be the case since you are 17
you will most likely go into the court room but they may ask you if you want to or not but i would call the cour people/police to talk about the guy that did this

because he just might do it in those few months
during my case thing we had to wait from i think december until march for the court date and the guy we were pressing charges against did rape another girl

that only made him be in there way longer but i wouldnt let this happen because you know how it feels to be raped and so do i but would you want another innocent girl to feel like that
   
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Re: RAPE - May 9th 2009, 12:54 AM

Hi there, Heather,

First off, I just want to say I'm proud of you for having the strength to report the rape, I know that's not the easiest thing in the world to do.

I've never pressed charges personally but I do know a fair bit about the legal system. Yes, you will have to be present at the trial to give your testimony [basically telling what happened]. The attorney assigned to your case will help you go over your testimony before the trial date, they'll make it as easy for you as possible. During the trial you most likely will be cross-examined, which means the attorney for the defendant [the rapist] will ask you questions to try and discredit your story or parts of your story [this is because they'll be trying to protect their client as best as possible].

The website you found is right but also wrong, in a way - it's not necessarily because you were a minor and he was a legal adult, it's because you were under the legal age of consent [which is 18 anyway].

After the trial, if he's found guilty he'll probably end up in jail until the sentencing trial. The minimum sentence varies from state to state but if he already has a criminal record, the sentencing judge will be sure to take that into account when determining the sentence.

I know the trial might seem scary but try to keep calm, you're being incredibly brave about all of this. Don't be afraid to speak with the detective assigned to your case to learn more about what'll be happening, he'll want to make it as easy as possible for you. Let me know if you need anything, all right? Take good care of yourself, Heather.



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  (#10 (permalink)) Old
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Re: RAPE - May 11th 2009, 11:53 PM

Thank you guys so much for your input !It really did help me not to feel so scared or bad for pressing charges even though he raped me i felt like i was making me life worse by doing this now i know im not ♥
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Re: RAPE - May 12th 2009, 07:54 PM

oh and to add to my post, cry infront of the judge, even if you dont feel like you want to just cry they will go harder on the rapist
i know it seems sexist but if you have a judge thats a guy or in your case even a girl they will be sympathetic (spelling?)
and the case will be more in your favor
you dont have to do this but it would help you (:
   
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Re: RAPE - May 13th 2009, 06:21 PM

Hey Heather,

I want to tell you how proud I am of you for coming forward and standing up for your rights like this. I don't think you will regret this because no matter what happens you still had the strength to do the right thing. HERE is a link that explains a little about the process of bringing your rapist to court. Hopefully that can help answer some of your questions. You will have to testify in court this is a chance to tell your story and explain to the jury why he needs to be put in jail. As long as you tell the truth you can't go wrong. I understand that it would be tremendously nerve wreaking to testify but no one in court is there to judge you over what happened. The victim doesn't get put on trail the rapist does. If you ever need someone to talk to I am here for you. You are not alone in this. Take care and stay strong.

Lots of love <3 Mimi



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