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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Stay determined
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Volunteering, Anxiety, Stressed. Help? - November 15th 2013, 07:15 PM

So today I had my first day at the local cat rescue centre. I was really worried that the cats weren't going to like me and they'd be all hissy at me...turns out that wasn't the thing to be worried about.

I got there and was told what to do and left to get on with cleaning a few of the pens out...but I still have a few questions which weren't covered in the initial explanation of what to do...so I kept asking questions when I needed to and I just felt like the guy was getting annoyed with me. Like sorry for asking questions for stuff I didn't know about :L

And then the other volunteers there. There were two high school students, must have been about 16 maybe and they were obviously already friends. It just reminded me of being back in high school again with all the bitching and laughing and mocking. I just knew they were saying things about me, laughing about me with each other. I know I shouldn't let it bother me but but it did. I just felt so small and old memories of high school where I was bullied a lot just got triggered

I was really looking forward to working here but now I just don't want to go back even though I put my name down for next Sunday already :/

I came back to my flat and just cried, I guess I'm thankful my boyfriend stayed over last night so he was there when I got back because otherwise I might have done something stupid :/

I'm not really sure what to do now. I'm doing something called the Principal's Award at university and part of that is doing at least 25 hours work experience over the year so I need some kind of work. My boyfriend said that I should try and find somewhere else if it's stressing me this much but I feel like this could happen everywhere I go...I'm scared I won't be able to cope with working ever :c

Should I just stick it out or should I leave and try and find somewhere else? I know at the end of the day it's my decision but hearing other people's opinions of what they'd do in this situation would help.
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Re: Volunteering, Anxiety, Stressed. Help? - November 15th 2013, 10:08 PM

Did you actually hear them talk about you or did you just hear them talking in general? It sounds like you are convincing yourself they were talking about you.

Also, chances are there will be different people there.
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Stay determined
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Re: Volunteering, Anxiety, Stressed. Help? - November 15th 2013, 10:54 PM

They kept looking over at me and then giggling with each other straight after. I've been around these types of girls my whole life so it's obvious that they were talking about me. They also kept giving me odd looks as well.

And it seems these girls are regulars that volunteer since they're friends with all the other staff as well so it's likely that they'll be there often...
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Re: Volunteering, Anxiety, Stressed. Help? - November 16th 2013, 01:31 AM

I think that you should just go back and maybe try talking to them casually if they're still there. I find that I am more comfortable with people after I know them a little bit better. If it still bugs you, then maybe look for somewhere else to do the service at. Sadly, we all have to learn to love who we are and not care what other people think because there will be criticism no matter where we go in life. Just keep trying

- Adalia

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Re: Volunteering, Anxiety, Stressed. Help? - November 17th 2013, 05:30 PM

I think you should try to go back as well and see what happens. You can try talking to them a little more and try to get a feel for how some of things are done. When I first started volunteering, it took me a few weeks to get comfortable doing it. I asked a ton of questions as well. If it doesn't go well, try looking into volunteering somewhere else. I hope this helps a bit!

"You'll have to decide for yourself. Walk on your own. Move forward. You've got a strong pair of legs, Rose. You should get up and use them."
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Re: Volunteering, Anxiety, Stressed. Help? - November 18th 2013, 03:56 AM

I agree, I think it's too early to quit for something you like.
But don't hesitate to leave if the first week is really socially strangling, and you don't see any way it could improve if they are absolute douchebags.

What lies ahead is unknown. However, in some times, I've sighted several smooth pavements. I myself am the mender of roads, and it is with these we work on.
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Re: Volunteering, Anxiety, Stressed. Help? - November 18th 2013, 05:11 AM

Hi Cara,

As the above posts have mentioned, I don't think you should quit yet. On the confronting front, that's up to you. You can if you want to, and you don't if you don't want to. However, I really don't think you shpuld give up just yet and up and quit. I'll tell you why.
They may be talking about you, whispering and laughing. And they may not be whispering about you. Whatever be the case, it's not aomething you have to bother yourself with. Let them think what they like. So, they are talking about someone because they are different from themselves. Let them be burdened with that. You don't need to share it. If they want to occupy their minds with you, let them go right ahead, what do you think?

Also, if they are those images of hoity toites that I'm conjuring in my head right now, they'll get more annpyed if you're ignoring them. After all, what are bullies? People trying to make themselves feel better or superior because they don't feel good about themselves, as much as they'd like to. And clearly they haven't grown up since high school, so who has really got it bad. You or them? I'd say them (;

Most important of all, bitchy girls and annoyance aside, do you like what you are doing? Do you like the volunteering jig? Caring for cats and such? If you don't, you shouldn't let them sway you. Let them be who you are. And you be you. Get on with your work and don't give a miniscule rodent's backside about them. If you need to talk to them make it short and pleasant. Don't show them you're affected by them. They'll give up talking about you soon enough. If you need to ask that guy questions, go ahead and ask away. Even if he geta irritated. If they didn't cover stuff and doubts have come up, it's important you ask them, because your work depends on it. You'll be appreciated for your good work. Maybe silently, but still appreciated, which is important. So long as the work satiafies you, keep doing it with all your heart. The work is more important than those girls who clearly haven't grown up. Do what you do best and have fun with it. Only when you don't like the work you're doing, consider other options. Consider, being the functional word here!

You're good at what you do, and you're strong. You'll be able to get through this with a smile on your face. Don't let it get the beat of you (;

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In a world that she can't rise above.
But her dreams give her wings and she flies to a place where she's loved.

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Re: Volunteering, Anxiety, Stressed. Help? - November 20th 2013, 10:04 AM

Just because they were giggling and looking at your way does not mean they were talking about you. They may be talking about something inappropriate and want to make sure you're not right there to tattle on them.

Also, you're stereotyping them. Those kind of girls?
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Re: Volunteering, Anxiety, Stressed. Help? - November 20th 2013, 02:03 PM

You only need 25 hours? That is like four or five days of volunteering, right?

If that is all you need, you might just stick it out if nothing else comes up. You would only have to go back a few more times, and you might be able to request a time when they are not there to go.

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