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Why Me? Here is a safe space to let it all out, where you can rant about all the bad things life throws your way. Sometimes it just helps to ask "why me?"

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
ladoglover Offline
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Bored Bored Bored - January 2nd 2021, 08:51 PM

I see so many people in chat it hurts. It hurts you guys get immediate support. I just have the forum so have to wait for someone to reply. I wish I could get immediate replies/support. I wish I could get in chat. It hurts I know everyone is glad I am not in chat. Hurts. I like having immediate support. I wish I could chat with you guys and be involved.

They know my history of being bullied in college and how that affected me and they know how I try t make friends but never do and how that has affected me. So being banded from chat is just bringing up all those same emotions and feelings of not belonging any where, feeling not included, feeling isolated, and not wanted.

So I really like the greatest showman on Disney plus. Amazing songs so uplifting. What's every one doing? I am trying to not just watch tv and get some stuff done. Maybe play the sims. Every one get there stimulus check? I did. I hope everyone did. I am watching the twilight zone old shows.

Whos in college? My college has already canceled spring break and many colleges have . Has yours? Any one dreading school starting again ?
   
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Everglow. Offline
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Re: Bored Bored Bored - January 2nd 2021, 09:04 PM

Hey

I know not being in chat hurts and I completely understand why. The forums do take longer for a reply to come in, and it's not the same as havign a conversation with someone, but they're a really good way to get to know people nonetheless. I hope you know that there is support here for you even outside of the chatroom, and that you're definitely involved in the community here in ways that extend beyond the chatroom. Please don't ever feel that people are glad you're not around. That's definitely not true! I've been a member here for a long time, and there's nobody here who enjoys seeing other people hurting. People volunteer here and keep on coming back because this site is a place for people to be themselves, and to be accepted, in ways they might not be elsewhere. That's the same for you too! You're just as welcome as anyone else is.

I'm sorry to hear about the bullying. I went through a lot of that myself and I can speak from experience when I say it's difficult not to see hostility everywhere when it's what you've grown up knowing. It's a very typical response because I think our brains almost get programmed to expect unkindness from people even outside of the context it happened in. try and challenge yourself to see that the chatroom, and TH in general, isn't college. The people here are not the people who bullied you. You're not in that space anymore. It takes a long time I think to adjust to not being there. For me, it took years. I'm 25 now; I left school in 2011, and every now and then I still find myself wondering if the group of kids on the bus are laughing because they've seen me. But it's mental effort to remind myself that this isn't school, and those people who hurt me then, can't hurt me anymore. Try and remind yourself of that anytime you feel like you're back in that zone. Challenge yourself to assess the situation in a new context. I promise you that nobody intends for you to feel isolated or bullied or not wanted, and I'm so sorry that you are feeling like that. As I say, I get that. I feel it. It's so close to what I know too, so I feel for you and I hope you know people do care.

On a much lighter note, I'm obsessed with the greatest showman! After I watched it the first time I had the soundtrack playing on repeat for WEEKS. What's your favourite song? I'd love to see it live on stage if it ever goes on tour!

I'm no longer in education, I finished my masters degree in 2020 though, and most of my lectures were cancelled for the final term due to Covid. It was very stressful, so I hope your college has things planned out well enough to keep the stress levels down as much as possible! I'd love to know more about what you're studying!

Take care, stay strong



A paradox:
The things you donít need to liveó
books, art, cinema, wine, and so onó
are the things you need to live
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- Matt Haig



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Re: Bored Bored Bored - January 2nd 2021, 09:27 PM

Oh okay. Yes, It s hard not to go back there in my brain but yes I remind my self they can't hurt me any more. Its hard. I just feel the same emotions I did before. That's okay they are just emotions feelings and it okay to feel them as they will pass. I know its just from past trauma the bulling. I know it is the past and to keep just trying to move forward.

Wow you have a masters degree at 25. Your so smart. That's awesome. I have only finished a year of grad school so far. I am studying clinical mental health to become a therapist. This is me is my favorite song. Its amazing so up lifting makes you feel like you can do anything.
   
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Re: Bored Bored Bored - January 2nd 2021, 09:32 PM

It's definitely hard! Like I say, I still struggle with it myself so I understand. It's not your fault that you went through all of that, and a lot of bullies don't see the damage that it can have on people later on, long after the bullying has stopped. It's amazing that you're challenging yourself, I know it isn't easy. It's good to move forward, just be kind to yourself. If something is effecting you, that's ok. You're allowed to be upset, angry, scared, or any other emotion you feel. But try to remember that the people you have to blame are not the people who are present when these emotions re-emerge. You're in control now, not them. You've 100% got this and we're here to help

I'm not that smart! But thank you for saying so! That's great, do you have an area of interest that draws you to that field?

I agree about that song, it's a great choice



A paradox:
The things you donít need to liveó
books, art, cinema, wine, and so onó
are the things you need to live
.

- Matt Haig



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ladoglover Offline
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Re: Bored Bored Bored - January 3rd 2021, 05:15 AM

I think I want to work with adolescents and young adult population. I just have been through hell and back through the mental health system. So I want to be a therapist to be the change that needs to happen and to give my patients what I always wanted and needed from a therapist but never got myself and sadly feel I never will.
   
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Celyn Offline
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Re: Bored Bored Bored - January 4th 2021, 12:13 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ladoglover View Post
I think I want to work with adolescents and young adult population. I just have been through hell and back through the mental health system. So I want to be a therapist to be the change that needs to happen and to give my patients what I always wanted and needed from a therapist but never got myself and sadly feel I never will.
I just want to drop by and say that I admire the fact that you want to work with adolescents to give them the help and support that you feel you never had. Be the change you want to see in the world


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Flight. Offline
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Re: Bored Bored Bored - January 5th 2021, 07:15 AM

It can be frustrating not being able to access chat to get the immediate reply that you may want. But that doesn't mean you can't access other support groups that may wish to help you immediately.


   
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Re: Bored Bored Bored - January 5th 2021, 10:07 PM

thanks. okay
   
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