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Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 7th 2009, 06:25 AM
I wanted to die at the age of 7
I am scared to show my affectionate side in front of people
I am scared to talk to others
Wonders if he is worth it half the time
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 8th 2009, 12:00 AM
I often feel betrayed by those closest to me.
People just don't try to understand my point of view, or how things make me feel and what the past has to do with it. It's easier to say I'm wrong or a jerk isn't it? I don't enjoy hurting alone, especially while being the bad guy. I guess I'm not alone, but I feel like it. I'm also never taken seriously. RAWR rant end.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 9th 2009, 03:54 AM
im pretty well falling apart and i think im giving up. just not going to care anymore. nobody reciprocates my "kindness" and "care". so forget it. all my life and yet nobody returns the same amount i put in. i dont ASK for it, but i guess i expect it back sometimes. i mean god damn come on! but im done. dont worry to acknowledge it anymore. im cold. im so fucking cold. and its thanks to everyone.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 9th 2009, 05:45 AM
Sometimes when I'm riding in the car I purposely don't wear a seatbelt because a part of me wants to get in a car crash.
Yesterday I saw you kissing tiny flowers
But everything that lives is born to die
And so I say to you that nothing really matters
And all you do is stand and cry.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 12th 2009, 06:03 AM
I have trust issues so bad, i cant trust my "best" friend.
I write poems, look in self expression for them.
Msg me for my msn/aim.
"I can't say that I was or am really so different from everyone else. I have 10 toes, 8 fingers, 2 thumbs. My hair just makes me look cooler! I was always happy with my hair color and how people treated me because of it. It was really just my not being able to get a tan that was hard for me. My red hair just makes me feel even more like an individual."- Anonymous
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 13th 2009, 07:57 PM
I believe it's better this way. I think if I was in a relationship I would be a burden.
"Why is it that, as a culture, we are more comfortable seeing two men holding guns than holding hands?" ~ Ernest Gaines
She was whole before that night,
Believed in heaven before that night,
And she's not the only one,
She knows she won't be the only one.
She's not asking what you're going to tell your daughter,
She's asking what you're going to teach your son.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 14th 2009, 02:36 PM
I'm scared of being happy. It's been so long, I don't even remember what it was like anymore. I'm so much more comfortable when I'm depressed.
I wish I could stop remembering. I wish that every time I close my eyes, I won't relive the last 4 months.
I'm still in love with him.
I don't believe in God, but I pray that He will kill me.
I wish I had never given her my journal.
I'm one of the most selfish people on this planet. I don't deserve anyone to love me, but they do. And I don't understand.
I wish I knew how to pull the blade out of my razor. It's killing not to be able to cut myself. I've resorted to starving myself.
I'm stuck in this miserable life because of two friends who aren't even my friends anymore.
Every day, I wish I were dead. But I can't die. I can't kill myself, and I'm not getting better, so I have to live the rest of my life like this. I can't imagine it.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 15th 2009, 05:27 AM
I Knew he would break up with me because i dont deserve to be happy Il always love him still
Sometimes(constantly) i feel like im fading in the background at school
I wonder what it would be like if i just let go..
Always i give small hints to my friends that i need help even when im mean its my way of yelling for them to notice but truly i dont think i deserve the help.
I know i need to get help for my self harming but i dont want to stop
I know i need to get help for my ed but truly i love it
Im scared of death and yet im not
I love you mom but your one of the causes for all my problems
I love that your happy but deep down i wish your girlfriend would break up with you because i want all your attention back
My friends always see me smiling but never see that so smile so godam fake
You wonder when i got this way Ive always been this way im just finally letting it out
I wish i could rid everyone of my horrible burdening self but i dont really want to be forgotten
Some say the world will end in fire,
Some say in ice.
From what I've tasted of desire
I hold with those who favor fire.
But if it had to perish twice,
I think I know enough of hate
To say that for destruction ice
Is also great
And would suffice.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 15th 2009, 07:07 PM
-Seeing all these sad posts about people's lives makes me feel better about myself. Simply because I know I'm not struggling in life, nor am I content, but I am happy. And I only just realised that actually, not that many people can say that. So I'm lucky. >_<
-When I was on 7 I did some terrible, terrible things that NO 7 year old should know how to, let alone actually do it. My mum found me and the guy one time, and to this day I'll never forgive myself. Okay, okay, so a seven year old can't...you know...but we did things of that ilk, and that's still so, so wrong. I still can't work out whether I'm responsible, or whether he is. And each time I think 'It's not my fault...is it? I didn't know better, right?' I die inside, of guilt. </3
"Few people arecapable of expressing with equanimity opinions which differ from the prejudices of their social environment. Most people are even incapable of forming such opinions." - Albert Einstein
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 16th 2009, 12:06 AM
Everyday i see you i wish you would talk to me or just look me in the eyes just once
I miss you so much..
Some say the world will end in fire,
Some say in ice.
From what I've tasted of desire
I hold with those who favor fire.
But if it had to perish twice,
I think I know enough of hate
To say that for destruction ice
Is also great
And would suffice.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 16th 2009, 09:44 PM
Ive had friends for nine years,7yrs,less than that and still ive never revealed my true self to them,i need to learn to trust
Some say the world will end in fire,
Some say in ice.
From what I've tasted of desire
I hold with those who favor fire.
But if it had to perish twice,
I think I know enough of hate
To say that for destruction ice
Is also great
And would suffice.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 17th 2009, 09:13 PM
im slowly killing myself inside and out,physically and mentally..
Some say the world will end in fire,
Some say in ice.
From what I've tasted of desire
I hold with those who favor fire.
But if it had to perish twice,
I think I know enough of hate
To say that for destruction ice
Is also great
And would suffice.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 20th 2009, 03:44 AM
i look at your profile everday, and think I still love you.
I write poems, look in self expression for them.
Msg me for my msn/aim.
"I can't say that I was or am really so different from everyone else. I have 10 toes, 8 fingers, 2 thumbs. My hair just makes me look cooler! I was always happy with my hair color and how people treated me because of it. It was really just my not being able to get a tan that was hard for me. My red hair just makes me feel even more like an individual."- Anonymous