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Relationships and Dating Ask here for advice on dates, break-ups and other relationship concerns.

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Dating through college - July 17th 2012, 06:21 AM

Okay so I just started dating my best friend of like 10 years, 4 months ago. She is going to a college about 30 minutes away and I'm going to one about 2 hours away. She is worried thag having a boyfriend will be too stressful and such. I love her so much and I really want to stay together but I'm not sure what to say or if it will work. I don't want to lose her.
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Re: Dating through college - July 17th 2012, 06:36 AM

You can't really tell what will happen. I broke up with my bf after my 1st year (dated him for 2 years and spent months in hell trying to be "ok" with our relationship and not getting over that and just ending it). But I know a lot of other people who did a 1-2 year gig then got married. I know other people who started dating in grade 11/12 (or even in 9/10) and are still together and I know people who got together during school and are still together.... So I can't tell you that you should freak out yet. It IS normal to stress out over this stuff. But lots of people have relationships in college/university and they are capable of having healthy relationships. If you guys haven't experienced it yet than it is reasonable to be anxious about what'll happen. But it would be best to just understand now that you guys will be busy and realize that it MIGHT mean you can't see each other much if you can handle that then that's a start




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Re: Dating through college - July 17th 2012, 11:18 AM

If it is too much to her, you should understand that. College is a lot of stress as it is already and it is true that dating someone is stressful. I don't think you'd be losing her if you've been friends for more than a decade now since it has been that long. It seems that commitment there is true in itself. However, there are other ways to contact her like Skype (webcaming), visiting each other when the times are right, etc. It's not impossible, but whether the strategies I suggested will work between you both is something you both have to agree and commit to. If these ways are feasible, just continue to assure her in the best way that you can. It isn't easy, but I'm sure it's worth the stress. Be there for each other. Good luck!




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Re: Dating through college - July 18th 2012, 01:39 AM

Yes, you guys should really talk about, at least try it. I started dating my boyfriend the summer before starting college. He goes to school about 1 1/2 hours away from where we live, and mine is about 30 min in the opposite direction. I didn't think I could handle it and broke up with him the first month of school, but we talked and he wanted to make it work. I decided I was really just afraid since everything was so new and so overwhelming, but I decided to try again. We've been together for 4 years now. But you never know what will happen, the best thing is to communicate your feelings about it to her.
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