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Boyfriend's request makes me feel uncomfortable - August 4th 2015, 09:46 PM

My boyfriend decided he would lend his father his car for the week as his father's car is currently out of commission. I, trying to be a happy supportive girlfriend, have been driving him to and from work. Yesterday things got awkward as he wanted me to drive him to work and pick him up from work and then drive him home and return after my work to pick him up and drive him all the way to his parents house to drop him off there and then return a couple of hours later to pick him up yet again to drive him back home. Now I'm pretty sure that is just down right blasphemous and incredibly insulting. Especially considering that he could bus an hour and thirteen minutes at the cost of $2.50 to get to his parents on his own. So I declined and told him he could take the bus if he really wanted to get there and he said he'd look up the bus schedule and decide if it was worth it to him to make the trip. He told me he'd not be taking the bus and that I could pick him up like usual and that he would go to his parents house the next day. Apparently he didn't even look up the bus schedule which tells me that it wasn't even worth it to him to put in the few seconds of his time to look to see what it would be like, but it is apparently worth all of my time to drive him around. I find this also to be incredibly insulting.


Now all this is occurring because his sister is back in town for the first time since December and he is super excited about it (though apparently not enough to bus to see her). I was totally excited to meet another member of his family and have a happy fun time and all, but now I really feel rather sour about it. It would be cool with me if I was being introduced to her because he was genuinely happy to share me with her, however it is being done as a means to an end. He doesn't have a car, and thus I'm being invited along as he wants a ride. I told him if he takes the bus there from his work I'd be willing to pick him up from his parents place afterwards but it seems as though he really wants to be driven there. Anyway I am super pissed off and really don't feel like meeting his sister at this point or driving there but I don't want to stop him from getting there either or be unsupportive. I don't know what to do, am I over reacting? Should I make him take the bus?


Today he invited me to drive him there and hang out and make cookies with him and his sister. This is because I refused to drive back and forth to get him yesterday, so of course he knows in order to have the ride he needs to invite me to hang out. I don't really want the first time I meet a member of his family to just be a means to an end.


tl;dr: BF asked me to drive him to work and back and then asked me to pick him up after I got out of work to drive him to all the way to his parents and then drop him off and then COME BACK to pick him up after he was done seeing them that night so I could take him to work from his house the next day.


"If you touch a spider web anywhere, you set the whole thing trembling. . . . As we move around this world and as we act with kindness, perhaps, or with indifference, or with hostility toward the people we meet, we too are setting the great spider web a-tremble. The life that I touch for good or ill will touch another life, and that in turn another, until who knows where the trembling stops or in what far place and time my touch will be felt. Our lives are linked. No person is an island."
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Re: Boyfriend's request makes me feel uncomfortable - August 5th 2015, 12:33 AM

Hey there

I honestly don't see anything wrong with telling your boyfriend that you will not do this. I think it's great that you have offered to give him a ride while he doesn't have a car but it seems as though he has gotten to a point where he is taking advantage of what you are offering him. While taking the bus can be annoying I think in this situation he is asking you to go way above and beyond what you need to do.

Have you tried talking to your boyfriend about your feelings regarding this matter? It's great you stuck up for yourself and told him to take the bus but have you explained how his behavior is making you feel? If not then let him know. Explain to him that you don't feel as though he really wants to introduce you to his sister instead you feel as though that was an after thought so that he would have a ride.

The best thing for a relationship is communication. The more you communicate with your partner the better.
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Re: Boyfriend's request makes me feel uncomfortable - August 5th 2015, 09:15 PM

I read the first chapter through. I don't want a girl like that. Period.
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