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Just want to scream (Trig)
Posted May 17th 2011 at 09:07 AM by Anatidaephobia
Updated May 17th 2011 at 09:31 AM by Anatidaephobia
Updated May 17th 2011 at 09:31 AM by Anatidaephobia
I'm useless. I am freaking useless. I can't do anything right. I was so happy this weekend everything seemed perfect i was practically on top of the world. Then yesterday i crashed. I hate that feeling. When you can feel yourself falling and theres nothing you can do about it. I feel so low. I have an exam in 2 hours. Going to fail. I don't know anything, can't concentrate. Images. I want them to stop. I want everything to stop. This is so hard. How am i supposed to pass feeling like this. I would struggle before all of this and now well is there any point? I can't handle everything. But i am pushing everyone away. I know why and it doesn't scare me. The though of death. I like it. It feels kinda warm and nice. Makes me smile. Things would be so much easier.
I just really don't feel safe right now. If it wasn't for my friend last night (you know who you are so thank you so much <3) I would have jumped or done something equally as stupid. Walked in front of a car though yesterday, it stopped though
Wish it would have hit me. Want to feel something. I went 3 days without cutting then i caved in. I had to. I feel so stupid and weak. I hate myself i really do. I just want to be good at something. I am a horrible selfish cow. I deserve to die.
I just really don't feel safe right now. If it wasn't for my friend last night (you know who you are so thank you so much <3) I would have jumped or done something equally as stupid. Walked in front of a car though yesterday, it stopped though
Wish it would have hit me. Want to feel something. I went 3 days without cutting then i caved in. I had to. I feel so stupid and weak. I hate myself i really do. I just want to be good at something. I am a horrible selfish cow. I deserve to die.
Total Comments 2
Comments
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Hey sweet. you are not selfish and you definately do not deserve to die. You're still fighting and you're doing realy well. It doesn't matter if you fall a little. You just have to keep going and lift yourself back up again. i know it seems like death is the only option and that nothing you can do will make it better but it will get better sweet, you have to keep trodding on. Love you so much huni and i'd die if i lost you. Give us a text. Im always here for you.
Stay strong
<3 xxxPosted May 17th 2011 at 10:17 AM by x_sepi_x
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your not useless, selfish or weak or horrible or a cow or stupid and you dont deserve to die.Posted May 17th 2011 at 08:01 PM by WhisperingSilence
