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Triggering: Thank you for triggering me, mum. Thank you for ruining it.
Posted February 17th 2012 at 08:37 PM by Evanesco
The fact that the scales are gone is freaking me out.
I was doing better. I was eating more. I was thinking less. I was feeling happier.
Now I'm triggered. Seriously triggered. I need those scales. I need to know I'm not gaining.
I don’t know what the fuck to do.
Well I do.
I know exactly what to do.
Yup, hello no food. Hello laxatives and stomach cramps. Hello exercising all night. Hello drinking shit loads of water. Hello curling up and dying.
God, I was feeling a bit better. But those scales were a safety net. I could eat what I liked because I could keep a check on my weight and if I gained I could lower my intake. But if I was maintaining I could eat.
Now I can’t, because I won’t know if I’ve gained. So I have to fucking lose.
Then maybe next time I find a scale I’ll have lost some weight.
Maybe by the time I get some scales I’ll be perfect.
I was doing better. I was eating more. I was thinking less. I was feeling happier.
Now I'm triggered. Seriously triggered. I need those scales. I need to know I'm not gaining.
I don’t know what the fuck to do.
Well I do.
I know exactly what to do.
Yup, hello no food. Hello laxatives and stomach cramps. Hello exercising all night. Hello drinking shit loads of water. Hello curling up and dying.
God, I was feeling a bit better. But those scales were a safety net. I could eat what I liked because I could keep a check on my weight and if I gained I could lower my intake. But if I was maintaining I could eat.
Now I can’t, because I won’t know if I’ve gained. So I have to fucking lose.
Then maybe next time I find a scale I’ll have lost some weight.
Maybe by the time I get some scales I’ll be perfect.
Total Comments 3
Comments
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Could you ask your mum to get some more scales ? And tell her the scales were a safety net. You don't need to stop eating just because of the scales have gone. Talk to your mum and ask about getting some more scales. You don't need to stop eating, everyone needs to eat. You don't need to loose weight and you don't have to loose weight. Keep going and keep fighting.Posted February 17th 2012 at 08:43 PM by WhisperingSilence
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I'm in the same position as you right now love. If I were you, I'd speak to your mum and ask her to get more scales, like Lyda said. Explain to her that they were what was helping you through this, and tell her you're struggling without them.
You're beautiful as you are. I'm always here
<3Posted February 17th 2012 at 08:47 PM by blumemusik♫
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I'm in the same position as you, Hester. I've got no scales in my home and it's driving me insane. However, you need to eat. It's essential to live. So please, eat. And after that, talk to your mum about buying another scale(s). That it was helping your recovery. Take care, lovely. You're beautiful.<3Posted February 17th 2012 at 09:25 PM by Stargazed.
