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Slipping so quickly.
Posted October 29th 2012 at 02:20 AM by i_like_black
The danger of admitting you're depressed, is once your brain is aware you're not in denial any longer, it drags you right down to where it wants you to be.
I swing between seriously suicidal with urgent intent to apathetic. And back again. And back again. And again. And again. And I'm so tired, I think soon I will give up and give in. I doubt I will die. It will be listed as serious self-harm, or a failed attempt. Who cares. I might get a good long dreamless sleep out of it.
The distractions aren't working so great.
I desperately want to cut.
I desperately want to not feel this way.
Since . . . early last week . . . it's been a fast slippery slide.
How long can I put on a facade of sanity for? I don't know.
I swing between seriously suicidal with urgent intent to apathetic. And back again. And back again. And again. And again. And I'm so tired, I think soon I will give up and give in. I doubt I will die. It will be listed as serious self-harm, or a failed attempt. Who cares. I might get a good long dreamless sleep out of it.
The distractions aren't working so great.
I desperately want to cut.
I desperately want to not feel this way.
Since . . . early last week . . . it's been a fast slippery slide.
How long can I put on a facade of sanity for? I don't know.
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