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I just can't anymore *Trig*
Posted November 14th 2015 at 02:50 AM by iambatman
Why do I feel this way? I wake up everyday disappointed...Because I wake up. I hate feeling this way. But everyday my mind tells me to kill myself...I hate my on being. I hate everything abut me. I feel like I am lost inside of my mind. I am consumed in my thoughts all the time. I try not to show how I am feeling, but lately it has been getting harder and harder. I hate it. I just think about what death feels like, all the time. And I have been having more and more hallucinations...Which is not good...And I have been having flashbacks from when I first stared cutting. I have started crying myself to sleep every night. I am glad my mom sleeps deeply. cos if she didn't, she'd have walked in my rom to check if I as asleep. I wasn't. I cant sleep. At All. I wish I could sleep because am about to start public school again...I guess I a prepared...I just feel like I am never accepted and no one loves me. The school I am going to is a school I was originally going to go to, before I moved. The only people I know there are my old friends...And I haven't even told them I am coming back...Bet they will be surprised...But no one will care. I am moving in with my stepdad....Ugh...He'll probably tell me to kill myself...might as well....I have literally nothing to live for. Absolutely nothing. My dad wont let me see my little brothers and sister so...I am never going to be happy. 
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