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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Glass Slipper Offline
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Is this self harm? - February 23rd 2014, 05:03 PM

I know exactly what self harm is considering I am a self harmed. But I'm not sure if you consider this self harm. I put hair ties around my wrist that are small and leave them there for a couple of days so they cut into my skin and hurt then I take them off and have a mark for awhile that is sore and sometimes it cuts in so much it leaves a scar but not often. Since it doesn't leave a scar or bruise or anything I'm confused on wether it's self harm or not.


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Re: Is this self harm? - February 23rd 2014, 05:14 PM

Hi there.

I think it depends on who is looking at the situation. I would personally say, yes this is self harm, but I am not you. Therefore, I don't know what is going through your mind when you do this. Are you doing it to hurt yourself? Do you use this to cope? Or do you just forget about it and leave the hair ties there? Whether or not it is self injurious behavior is probably up for you or a professional to decide. You could also check out this thread for the exact definition. Hope this helped.


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Re: Is this self harm? - February 23rd 2014, 06:06 PM

Personally I believe that if you are inflicting pain upon yourself intentionally for any reason it's considered self harm. What you're doing might not be resulting in serious injury but you're still doing it with the intent to harm yourself. Also, in my opinion, the physical effect of self harm is not the only thing that makes it dangerous. To me it was never the scars or the cuts that made self harm a problem. It was the act of turning to a negative coping mechanism to relieve your pain. That becomes a habit, and it can result in turning to many other negative coping mechanisms in the future, whether they are related to self harm or not. You have to know how to cope in a positive way and self harm prevents you from doing that. So in my mind, even though this isn't leaving you with scars or other injury, it is still harming you because it is preventing you from finding positive ways of coping.


   
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Re: Is this self harm? - February 23rd 2014, 06:32 PM

There always seems to be a little bit of a "gray area" when it comes to things such as rubber bands or hair ties. A lot of people use rubber bands or hair ties as a sort of alternative, though what I've heard most of all is them snapping the rubber band or hair tie, rather than leaving a small one on the wrist. The "gray area" in the case I mentioned is that these objects CAN be used as an alternative, but if it gets to the point where it's leaving marks for a while and making you sore for a while, then it actually turns into a negative thing.

Personally, I see self harm as anything that is done to inflict damage, pain, or marks. Based on my personal definition, since it's used with the intent to harm yourself and inflict marks, it would be self harm. Inflicting pain definitely isn't the best way to cope.


   
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Re: Is this self harm? - February 23rd 2014, 07:55 PM

Hi there,

I, essentially, agree with what the others are saying. Some acts that can be defined as self harm fall into somewhat of a grey area, but I think that the intent to hurt oneself is what sets apart an act from others that might not be considered self harm. When considering this, I believe it's not really the exact action that's being carried out that should be taken into account, but the mindset of the person doing it, i.e. are they deliberately trying to cause themself pain?

All the best. I hope you can find some other ways to cope.

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Re: Is this self harm? - February 23rd 2014, 08:22 PM

Hi there!

I think that when you're intentionally doing something that causes marks or physical pain, that it's considered self-harm. Because to me, it seems like it'd be the same as cutting, less severe obviously but still causing pain on yourself.

I hope you can find a more healthy alternative for yourself. Good luck. Message me if you'd like to talk.
   
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Re: Is this self harm? - February 24th 2014, 12:58 PM

Hey there,

I'm sorry you're struggling with something that makes you want to hurt yourself. I would consider this self harming, because as already stated, if you are inflicting pain upon yourself to cope then it is self-harm. Although everyone has the right to an opinion, I don't like that people only consider cutting & burning as self-harm. There are so many other things people do that is self harm, and this seems like one of them. Just because what you're doing isn't leaving visible scars, it doesn't mean it's not as important. I hope you decide to find the help that you deserve because no one should have to go through so much pain that they want themselves to get hurt. Take care.
   
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Re: Is this self harm? - February 24th 2014, 08:21 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaleidoscope View Post
Hi there.

Therefore, I don't know what is going through your mind when you do this. Are you doing it to hurt yourself? Do you use this to cope? Or do you just forget about it and leave the hair ties there? .
I put the hair tie on my wrist knowing what it would do and not caring and when it started to hurt that day I didn't take it off I left it on for a day. So i basically just did it for the hell of it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Calliope View Post
Personally I believe that if you are inflicting pain upon yourself intentionally for any reason it's considered self harm. What you're doing might not be resulting in serious injury but you're still doing it with the intent to harm yourself.
Like I said above I don't know if I did it in the intent of harming myself even though I knew it would I just did it for the hell of it

Quote:
Originally Posted by Terabithia. View Post
There always seems to be a little bit of a "gray area" when it comes to things such as rubber bands or hair ties. A lot of people use rubber bands or hair ties as a sort of alternative, though what I've heard most of all is them snapping the rubber band or hair tie, rather than leaving a small one on the wrist. The "gray area" in the case I mentioned is that these objects CAN be used as an alternative, but if it gets to the point where it's leaving marks for a while and making you sore for a while, then it actually turns into a negative thing.

I used to snap rubber bands on my wrist but I did it so hard that it would bruise and leave marks and it cut my skin at times. I don't know why I leave the hair tie on my wrist but I just do it...


But I guess all of this make sense and I can see where it's considered self-harm. I probably did it because I am not cutting.


We may shine, we may shatter,
We may be picking up the pieces here on after,
We are fragile, we are human,
We are shaped by the light we let through us,
We break fast, cause we are glass.
Cause we are glass.
|Member 2007||Senior Community Mentor||Social Media Guru||Resource & Newsletter Editor||Writer||Chat Mod|
|Forum Mod: LGBT, Sexuality and gender identity, Eating Disorders, Self-Harm, Peer Pressure and Bullying, Disability, Good Days, Friends & Family|
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Re: Is this self harm? - February 25th 2014, 10:13 PM

yes this self harm I go through the same thing except I put wire on my ankles, plz don't do it anymore. I can't stop it has become a sort of addiction to me.

how much longer till I give up

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