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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Jordioa18 Offline
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Considering dropping out of college - June 26th 2017, 09:56 AM

So I've been having some problems with my education lately. It's going a little too fast for me and they treat the ability to plan as a career life-or-death situation. Because of my disability (ABI, got a stroke right after birth which damaged the parts that manage my planning skills and social-emotional skills) I don't have much of an ability to plan projects and because of that I am left with three choices:

Option A: Work as hard as I can to get my diploma next year

This is the quick solution. Leave almost everything else in my life in a (far) backseat and focus almost a 100% on college, but that would leave me to a lot more stress, a little to no time for much else in my life (Maybe even no time for my girlfriend), it would feel like I'm doing this more for my parents' financial situation and it could stretch out to option B if I stumble, but if it works, I can get better work much quicker.

Option B: Stay in school, but take a little longer (A half or full year more) to graduate

Although it would take longer to graduate and find a better job in my field, I would still have time for life outside of college and have more time to understand things, but the biggest caveat is that I will have more yapping from my parents about money and why I don't graduate in a year because apart from planning I have the capabilities to, and with the yapping about money I am afraid I will take (part of it) out on my girlfriend because her field of work pretty much guarantees paid internships and most of the year is internship there. It would get me better work, but not as quick as option A

Option C: Drop out of college

The biggest argument supporting this is because I earned a degree before this so I have something to fall back on, so I can get work, but it's a little tougher to find it (My mother and me are also planning to visit jobcoaches in the future nonetheless). Another reason to do this is for me to divert attention more to learning general independence and other skills that might prove useful for me or want to learn. I can always return to education later in my life if I so desire as well. But the caveats are that I would get into fights with my family about it, maybe even get called dumb or "about to be a dirty homeless man" or anything else in the book, I have more chance to be in a (slightly) worse job in the future, the last year would be effort for nothing mostly and student loan debt is an issue too (Although I can think I can pay that back).

Oh, and there is another option.

Option Move to another school or turn the education to a more work-oriented style instead of more school-oriented

This would be kind of a wildcard. If I picked to go to another school, I will probably take a little more longer to get to that college (I am attending the college that is closest to me now), but maybe the way they guide students is better than my current college. But it is pretty late to do that right now. The other option that I just came up with is to try to make it more work-oriented (BBL) instead of school-oriented (BOL). The main caveats are that I have to do more work at home and no student loan, but I get to have my own income and learn more in practice than at school, which I feel more comfortable with than school-based

But to be honest, after 16-17 years of being in school I would want a break from it all at least when I think of it sometimes. I don't look back at schooltime too fondly apart from my graduations and second elementary school at education level. It wasn't all for nothing and am glad and proud of what I achieved there, but I have faced discrimination in my prior years because of my disability and like I said above, at the course I am at now they see planning as a life-or-death situation to pass. Staying in college nonetheless would give me a bigger chance at finding a good job, but I'm kind of at wits end here


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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
The Darkness Offline
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Re: Considering dropping out of college - June 26th 2017, 04:55 PM

Does your school have a disability resource center and are you registered with them? They usually have accommodations that can help ease the course load or accommodate the class to your needs. They can offer you a variety of things to help you succeed and reach your goals.
I'm one for encouraging everyone to keep going in school. My mom is the same with my schooling, I want to stay just one more year longer but she says I'm just wasting money (even though I get financial aid through the government) because my major isn't gonna be gaining me millions by the time I graduate. I say, if you can afford it, stay in school a little longer.


THE POINT OF SINGULARITY IS NOTHING AS NOTHING BEGAN EVERYTHING
PULSING IN THE EXPAND CONSUME WITHOUT BARRIER OR BORDER
IT IS DARK BECAUSE IT IS THE DARKNESS IT IS OVER BECAUSE IT IS THE END
THERE IS NO SENTRY BECAUSE NONE DARE APPROACH
IT HAS NEVER BEEN AND IT IS ALL THAT EVER WAS
AT THE CENTER YOU DO NOT FIND THE ANSWER
YOU DO NOT FIND YOURSELF THERE IS NO CENTER AND THERE IS NO YOU THERE IS ONLY MADNESS
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WE ARE ALL HERE.
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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Considering dropping out of college - June 28th 2017, 09:23 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by The Darkness View Post
Does your school have a disability resource center and are you registered with them? They usually have accommodations that can help ease the course load or accommodate the class to your needs. They can offer you a variety of things to help you succeed and reach your goals.
I'm one for encouraging everyone to keep going in school. My mom is the same with my schooling, I want to stay just one more year longer but she says I'm just wasting money (even though I get financial aid through the government) because my major isn't gonna be gaining me millions by the time I graduate. I say, if you can afford it, stay in school a little longer.
In my country we have something called "Passend Onderwijs" (Which funds schools over the country and almost every kind of school to give kids/students with disabilities the help that they need) that does that in a way.


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Re: Considering dropping out of college - June 28th 2017, 10:15 PM

The one thing I will say is that there are a lot of people who struggle with going to school and working and this leads to them never being able to actually complete the degree they wanted to. However, there are a lot of people who have no problem with school and work. I am hoping to be able to go back to school after I get a job and have adjusted a bit but I am very much aware of my limits and have tried to come up with plans that will help minimize the stress I might experience when going back to school.

Personally, as someone with a disability that has impacted my ability to go to school, I have found that taking fewer classes was actually a lot more manageable. I have found that when I try and take 12-15 units a semester (that's the average amount a student takes in the USA) that I would end up overwhelmed and I would either drop the classes or end up doing poorly. While taking fewer units did mean that I was not able to finish as fast as I wanted it turned out to be more productive than taking a full course load and not being able to complete the classes.

So, I would honestly suggest that you consider that option....taking a bit longer to finish the program.

Is it possible for you to talk out some of the concerns you have regarding that option with your parents and your girlfriend? I know I was able to talk to my dad about what I should do and he agreed that 1) I should change my major and 2) I should take fewer classes. It's possible that your parents and girlfriend would be able to support you through this.

Best of luck.


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Re: Considering dropping out of college - June 29th 2017, 09:04 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Abibliophobe~ View Post
The one thing I will say is that there are a lot of people who struggle with going to school and working and this leads to them never being able to actually complete the degree they wanted to. However, there are a lot of people who have no problem with school and work. I am hoping to be able to go back to school after I get a job and have adjusted a bit but I am very much aware of my limits and have tried to come up with plans that will help minimize the stress I might experience when going back to school.

Personally, as someone with a disability that has impacted my ability to go to school, I have found that taking fewer classes was actually a lot more manageable. I have found that when I try and take 12-15 units a semester (that's the average amount a student takes in the USA) that I would end up overwhelmed and I would either drop the classes or end up doing poorly. While taking fewer units did mean that I was not able to finish as fast as I wanted it turned out to be more productive than taking a full course load and not being able to complete the classes.

So, I would honestly suggest that you consider that option....taking a bit longer to finish the program.

Is it possible for you to talk out some of the concerns you have regarding that option with your parents and your girlfriend? I know I was able to talk to my dad about what I should do and he agreed that 1) I should change my major and 2) I should take fewer classes. It's possible that your parents and girlfriend would be able to support you through this.

Best of luck.
I am personally warming more up on taking a bit longer to finish my major. Only thing is that I might catch some flak from my family. I won't have math and English next year (I had both exams this year), but I have a lot to pay attention to at Dutch and again, my greatest stumbling block in the curriculum, planning (I do have help with planning though).

I don't have much of a feeling that my parents (Mostly my mom) would be approachable to this kind of thing. My mom expects me to finish next year regardless of pressure and one reason why she wants that is because it wouldn't cost any more money. If it all went her way (Mine in a way too), I would've graduated at the level I am now in at this moment instead of doing a level lower first (Which in hindsight was an actual good idea because I can drop out with something to fall back on if push comes to shove) and taking a year longer to be overall finished with school life. If I approach her with it, she either gets pissed at the school or at me and I don't need that shit in any way as she tends to get big league pissed which makes me panic mostly. My girlfriend says I should take a little longer as well, so I gotta see how it will go with money/job arguments/jealousy


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Re: Considering dropping out of college - June 30th 2017, 03:16 PM

It`s only your choice! Nobody can advise you what to do. When I was in such situation I was really scared of what could I do next. Nobody could tell me what would be the right choice. I decided to left college and start working. And I have to say that I don`t regret any moment. I found myself in writing for some custom writing service. [Edited] Maybe you can find something interesting for you and your future career.

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Re: Considering dropping out of college - July 1st 2017, 05:04 AM

I'm only going to say this once, do NOT drop out of school. That would definitely be a bad choice.

During my last year of college, my grandma and grandpa passed away, and my parents got a divorce. I was also bullied a lot during the time. Needless to say, with all of that and a learning disability/severe anxiety of having to go to school, I still finished, and graduated with distinction, on the honor roll, and with a well paying job in my field.

I say talk to accessibility services to see how they can help you. If you have to cut back on how many courses you take at once, then do it. It will help.

Best of luck
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Re: Considering dropping out of college - July 2nd 2017, 03:33 PM

If option b doesn't yield more debt, I'd choose that. It's important to manage a social life outside of school, especially if you're in a relationship. In the grand scheme of things, taking half a year longer or so really won't matter in the scope of your lifetime. Take it from me: I'm 29 years old. I returned to school 2 years ago. I am recently married. I used to load up on courses, but I've decided to cut back on my semester so I can spend time with my wife, and enjoy my life. Yeah, it might not be the most ideal option since graduating sooner would be nice. But I'm glad I'm not overly stressed and have enough time to spend with my wife and work on her with her photography business.

Good luck.


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